7:35 pm
Dressing Room
This is it. Last Show. Last Cookie.
Let's see what tonight's naughty prediction is...
"You will get lucky tonight. Several times."
And there's handwriting on the back...
"I Love You, Baby. xoxo Cate"
I KNEW it! She's been here with me all along, every Dirty Cookie, every single show. She must have been in cahoots with Dawn, somehow. I'll have to get her to reveal her secrets when we're on the beach tomorrow, heh heh.
And I love it. Especially when my fortunes come true.
9:05 pm
Dressing Room
Sometimes I really love my job.
Like today.
C'mon Boys -- let's go kick this motherfucking crowd's Ass!
One. More. Time.
Saturday, July 30
2:50 am
Suite
Finally here. Last hotel room of the tour.
Damn, it feels great to say that.
Tonight was fun. The show was good, we all just hung out and had a good time. Played some stuff we haven't in awhile. Hell, played some stuff we've never played, ha ha.
Proved once again to my Wife that I have the best band in the world. When we were all at the dinner table earlier she was goofing around on her phone, came across that old Romeo and Juliet song. She smiled and did one of those dreamy "Ooh, I like this song," sighs.
So we played it. A couple quick chords, pull up the words on Google, get 'em up on the Tele... no problem. The look on her face was priceless when we pulled that bad boy out during the encore. Her eyes got real big, then she grinned and shook her head. Could see it plain as day in her expression. "You Got Me." Ha ha.
I love surprising her.
It was one of those nights. I really didn't want to come offstage. But I had to. My chords were done, I gotta save a little something for tomorrow night.
Funny, it's like this every time. I can't wait for the tour to be over, but when it almost is, those last few shows... I don't want to let go. I just want to stay up there and sing and dance and let my band play. It's a great feeling. I'll miss it when we're done, after I recuperate.
But not enough to keep going. Time to stop. Time to enjoy my Wife and Kids. And to make more Kids.
Speaking of Kids, talked to Steph earlier, on the plane here. She's not working tonight, which surprised me. A summer Friday night at the Parrot is always crazy. Guess she traded shifts with one of the other girls or something.
She and Brendan were at the house, getting ready to go out to that movie on the beach thing they do on summer weekend nights. I asked how they're doing, her and Brendan. She said good, but she sounded a little distracted. I wonder if that other guy still has her eye. I kinda hope not, I like seeing her happy with Brendan.
I guess we'll see when I get home. Stephie and I will be in the same house for a couple weeks, until I take her up to school. I hope we get to spend some one-on-one time together. I'm gonna miss her like crazy when she's gone this fall.
So after Steph had to go I gave Jess a call. Got his voicemail, but he texted me back about a half hour later. He's with Bridget. Tonight's not the big dinner date night, though -- they were headed to a movie too. I told him to have fun and give me a call tomorrow, and that I miss him.
I didn't call the Chuckleheads because it was past their bedtime. I did send Dorothea a text, though, asking what would be a good time to call tomorrow. I haven't talked much to her the last few days; think she's still a little pissed that I fucked up her plans. But she'll get over it. Until then we'll just stay out of each other's way.
So by the time I checked in with everybody and did a little chit-chatting with Cate and Mama Joan we were almost ready to land in Lisbon. We did the usual drill: wave at the cameras, shake all the airport people's hands, get in the vans to go to Customs, yadda yadda.
It never ceases to amaze me how easily my Wife sneaks through Customs. She just waltzes in and flashes her badge while she hands over her passport, and BAM. She's done. I mean, it's not like we have it rough with our VIP treatment, but still. She doesn't have to do anything. In fact, by the time I finished she had already done her required check-in with the U.S. Embassy, retrieved her messages, and sent like 5 e-mails.
And I told her that's the last time she's e-mailing work on this trip. If I'm almost done working, so is she.
Besides, we both have other things to work on. Like Baby-Making. That's gonna take a lot of attention and effort, ha ha.
But not tonight. I'm finally winding down from the show, getting tired. She caught me yawning a few minutes ago. I know she's tired too, she's still a little sideways from the time change.
I'm unpacked and my teeth are brushed, clothes are in a pile on the floor. Cate's in the bathroom doing whatever it is she does in there before bedtime. As soon as she's done we're gonna pull back the sheets and crawl into this big ol' bed and curl up around each other and have a little romantic pillow talk, then slip off to Dreamland together. Just like we'll do every night from now on.
Can't think of a better way to finish the day than with my Baby in my arms.
11:20 pm
Suite
My Son cracks me up.
Tonight's the night. Jesse's doing his romantic candlelight dinner for Bridget. He's at our apartment, up to his elbows in kitchen stuff. In fact, Cate's talking to him on Skype right now, coaching him through the cooking.
She showed him how to make this dinner earlier this week, but guess it didn't fully take. He must have been distracted by the idea of dessert, ha ha.
The Kid's trying, though. And he seems to be doing a pretty good job. He got the salad together no problem and has the water on so he can throw the pasta in when his date arrives, but the chicken intimidated him a little. So he called StepMama for a refresher course.
I'm having a ball sitting here watching and listening to them. It's pretty funny, and very sweet.
Dorothea and I have one helluva fine young man in our eldest Son.
When Cate and I were hanging out by the pool Thursday she told me all about the cooking lesson. She and Jesse went to the market together, she helped him pick out all the ingredients he'd need, then they went back to our place and she showed him how to do everything: clean, chop, season, cook... the whole deal. Cate said Jess was actually already a pretty good sous-chef; apparently Steph and Dorothea have taught him a thing or two.
She also helped Jess figure out what to do for atmosphere, how to make our place pretty and romantic and special without making it seem like some kinda Love Den, ha ha.
I knew Cate would understand when I told her about my conversation with Jess and my motive behind letting him have a date at our house while we were out of town. Like me, she's not crazy about setting a precedent that we have some kind of anytime hook-up spot in our home. But she totally agreed when I told her I want Jess and Bridget to be safe and have some privacy when the inevitable happens.
And if it's not this weekend, that's great. They can still enjoy a little time to themselves for romance, even if they don't go all the way.
And my Wife, being the two-steps-ahead-of-me Cop she is, did something I didn't even think about. She took all the alcohol out of the house. It's all in the trunk of her car, ha ha. Smart cookie, my Wife. I don't really think Jesse would be dumb enough to get monkey-ass drunk in my house on my booze when I'm giving him this opportunity to act like a Man.
But he is a teenager, and sometimes their brains just don't work. And he did pull the beer incident in DC with his buddies. So better safe than sorry, I guess.
But even Cate got a little soft-hearted... she left an open bottle of Pinot Gris in the fridge. She happened to "casually mention" to Jesse just a few minutes ago that it will go bad before we get back from Italy, which would be a shame. And it just happens to be a nice wine to pair with chicken saltimbocca.
Nice touch there, Miss Cupid. Ha ha.
So Jesse's almost done with his cooking. He has the table all set with the nice dishes and candles and flowers. He picked up fresh bread from the bakery on the corner on his way over. And tiramasu for dessert. He's got on a nice shirt and clean pants and hopefully clean underwear. The only things he needs now are music and his Girl.
I just asked him if he wanted my recommendation for romantic music. Cate giggled when Jess kinda sighed "No, Dad... I already got the Sinatra playlist up." I swear I could hear him rolling his eyes.
Son, lemme tell ya... ain't none of that shit music you listen to gonna get you laid like Frank will. Trust me.
Looks like he's all ready to go, and Bridget should be there soon. Cate's giving him last-minute instructions for the pasta and for keeping the chicken warm. Nothing left to do but wish him good luck and tell him to have a nice night and be sure not to bust his curfew. And if tonight's the night, be smart and use a condom.
But I can't say that in front of Cate. He'll be embarrassed as Hell. That I'll text.
This whole thing makes me smile.
So Jess isn't the only one having a sweet, romantic night tonight. Cate and I just got back from dinner awhile ago. We had a lovely, somewhat quiet day today. Went out and did a little sightseeing and shopping, which would have been perfect if we hadn't been interrupted at least a dozen times for photos and autographs.
I don't normally mind if it happens once or twice, but by the fifth time Cate had to squeeze my hand and give me that little "be nice" reminder in my ear. When we had a minute alone she reminded me that I'm the reason this city is crawling with women from all over the planet, and of course when they get their chance to touch me or talk to me they're gonna.
She also said she'll kick their asses if they try to cop a feel, ha ha.
So I did the grin-and-bear-it routine and tried to enjoy a lovely summer afternoon with my Wife. And aside from feeling like I was the target of a bad surveillance op, it was nice. Cate and I bought a beautiful blown-glass bowl, and I couldn't resist buying her a silver necklace.
She always teases me that I enjoy buying her jewelry more than she enjoys getting it, and she might be right. There's something about picking out something pretty for the woman you love that just makes a guy feel Manly, ha ha. But she was sincere when she gave me a thank you kiss right there in the store.
Cate bought me a present, too. We were in this little stationery store where she was looking around for cards for a couple of her friends. They had these beautiful tooled-leather bound journals, with thick, gilt-edged pages. The covers had these ornate scrolled designs, every one different. She saw me looking at one and told the clerk to add it to her purchases, the Sneak.
Later when we were having gelato she gave it to me. She said she noticed this old book is getting pretty worn out, and it's almost full. And she thought it might be a fitting start to the first day of the rest of our post-tour life to start with a fresh blank page.
I love that idea.
So after an afternoon of leisure we came back and got dressed up to go out again, this time for a little celebration. Cate's birthday is tomorrow but with all the hoopla surrounding the Last Show we're gonna be all kinds of busy. There will be about a bazillion special guests and business people to entertain and the obligatory hands to shake and photos to take and champagne bottles to pop.
I didn't want to try to steal a minute with her tomorrow when I'll be pulled in a billion directions, and not be able to do it. So we went out to celebrate tonight. We had wonderful food and wine and dancing to Spanish guitar music. And then we came back here to continue our celebration... until Jesse called.
One of the pitfalls of Parenting, ha ha. No matter their age, somehow the Kids always know how to interrupt at just the right moment.
And we'll still do a little something special for Cate tomorrow. I asked Dawn to order up a birthday cake and to have the chef make something special for dinner before the show. We'll all sing Happy Birthday and have her blow out the candles. And I'll chuckle at the wonderment I know will be in her smile as she looks around and realizes her very favorite rock band in the world showed up to her birthday party.
Ain't that every Girl's dream? Ha ha.
In just a few more minutes it will officially be Cate's birthday. And it will officially be my last day of work for awhile. Reasons for us both to celebrate.
Suite
Finally here. Last hotel room of the tour.
Damn, it feels great to say that.
Tonight was fun. The show was good, we all just hung out and had a good time. Played some stuff we haven't in awhile. Hell, played some stuff we've never played, ha ha.
Proved once again to my Wife that I have the best band in the world. When we were all at the dinner table earlier she was goofing around on her phone, came across that old Romeo and Juliet song. She smiled and did one of those dreamy "Ooh, I like this song," sighs.
So we played it. A couple quick chords, pull up the words on Google, get 'em up on the Tele... no problem. The look on her face was priceless when we pulled that bad boy out during the encore. Her eyes got real big, then she grinned and shook her head. Could see it plain as day in her expression. "You Got Me." Ha ha.
I love surprising her.
It was one of those nights. I really didn't want to come offstage. But I had to. My chords were done, I gotta save a little something for tomorrow night.
Funny, it's like this every time. I can't wait for the tour to be over, but when it almost is, those last few shows... I don't want to let go. I just want to stay up there and sing and dance and let my band play. It's a great feeling. I'll miss it when we're done, after I recuperate.
But not enough to keep going. Time to stop. Time to enjoy my Wife and Kids. And to make more Kids.
Speaking of Kids, talked to Steph earlier, on the plane here. She's not working tonight, which surprised me. A summer Friday night at the Parrot is always crazy. Guess she traded shifts with one of the other girls or something.
She and Brendan were at the house, getting ready to go out to that movie on the beach thing they do on summer weekend nights. I asked how they're doing, her and Brendan. She said good, but she sounded a little distracted. I wonder if that other guy still has her eye. I kinda hope not, I like seeing her happy with Brendan.
I guess we'll see when I get home. Stephie and I will be in the same house for a couple weeks, until I take her up to school. I hope we get to spend some one-on-one time together. I'm gonna miss her like crazy when she's gone this fall.
So after Steph had to go I gave Jess a call. Got his voicemail, but he texted me back about a half hour later. He's with Bridget. Tonight's not the big dinner date night, though -- they were headed to a movie too. I told him to have fun and give me a call tomorrow, and that I miss him.
I didn't call the Chuckleheads because it was past their bedtime. I did send Dorothea a text, though, asking what would be a good time to call tomorrow. I haven't talked much to her the last few days; think she's still a little pissed that I fucked up her plans. But she'll get over it. Until then we'll just stay out of each other's way.
So by the time I checked in with everybody and did a little chit-chatting with Cate and Mama Joan we were almost ready to land in Lisbon. We did the usual drill: wave at the cameras, shake all the airport people's hands, get in the vans to go to Customs, yadda yadda.
It never ceases to amaze me how easily my Wife sneaks through Customs. She just waltzes in and flashes her badge while she hands over her passport, and BAM. She's done. I mean, it's not like we have it rough with our VIP treatment, but still. She doesn't have to do anything. In fact, by the time I finished she had already done her required check-in with the U.S. Embassy, retrieved her messages, and sent like 5 e-mails.
And I told her that's the last time she's e-mailing work on this trip. If I'm almost done working, so is she.
Besides, we both have other things to work on. Like Baby-Making. That's gonna take a lot of attention and effort, ha ha.
But not tonight. I'm finally winding down from the show, getting tired. She caught me yawning a few minutes ago. I know she's tired too, she's still a little sideways from the time change.
I'm unpacked and my teeth are brushed, clothes are in a pile on the floor. Cate's in the bathroom doing whatever it is she does in there before bedtime. As soon as she's done we're gonna pull back the sheets and crawl into this big ol' bed and curl up around each other and have a little romantic pillow talk, then slip off to Dreamland together. Just like we'll do every night from now on.
Can't think of a better way to finish the day than with my Baby in my arms.
11:20 pm
Suite
My Son cracks me up.
Tonight's the night. Jesse's doing his romantic candlelight dinner for Bridget. He's at our apartment, up to his elbows in kitchen stuff. In fact, Cate's talking to him on Skype right now, coaching him through the cooking.
She showed him how to make this dinner earlier this week, but guess it didn't fully take. He must have been distracted by the idea of dessert, ha ha.
The Kid's trying, though. And he seems to be doing a pretty good job. He got the salad together no problem and has the water on so he can throw the pasta in when his date arrives, but the chicken intimidated him a little. So he called StepMama for a refresher course.
I'm having a ball sitting here watching and listening to them. It's pretty funny, and very sweet.
Dorothea and I have one helluva fine young man in our eldest Son.
When Cate and I were hanging out by the pool Thursday she told me all about the cooking lesson. She and Jesse went to the market together, she helped him pick out all the ingredients he'd need, then they went back to our place and she showed him how to do everything: clean, chop, season, cook... the whole deal. Cate said Jess was actually already a pretty good sous-chef; apparently Steph and Dorothea have taught him a thing or two.
She also helped Jess figure out what to do for atmosphere, how to make our place pretty and romantic and special without making it seem like some kinda Love Den, ha ha.
I knew Cate would understand when I told her about my conversation with Jess and my motive behind letting him have a date at our house while we were out of town. Like me, she's not crazy about setting a precedent that we have some kind of anytime hook-up spot in our home. But she totally agreed when I told her I want Jess and Bridget to be safe and have some privacy when the inevitable happens.
And if it's not this weekend, that's great. They can still enjoy a little time to themselves for romance, even if they don't go all the way.
And my Wife, being the two-steps-ahead-of-me Cop she is, did something I didn't even think about. She took all the alcohol out of the house. It's all in the trunk of her car, ha ha. Smart cookie, my Wife. I don't really think Jesse would be dumb enough to get monkey-ass drunk in my house on my booze when I'm giving him this opportunity to act like a Man.
But he is a teenager, and sometimes their brains just don't work. And he did pull the beer incident in DC with his buddies. So better safe than sorry, I guess.
But even Cate got a little soft-hearted... she left an open bottle of Pinot Gris in the fridge. She happened to "casually mention" to Jesse just a few minutes ago that it will go bad before we get back from Italy, which would be a shame. And it just happens to be a nice wine to pair with chicken saltimbocca.
Nice touch there, Miss Cupid. Ha ha.
So Jesse's almost done with his cooking. He has the table all set with the nice dishes and candles and flowers. He picked up fresh bread from the bakery on the corner on his way over. And tiramasu for dessert. He's got on a nice shirt and clean pants and hopefully clean underwear. The only things he needs now are music and his Girl.
I just asked him if he wanted my recommendation for romantic music. Cate giggled when Jess kinda sighed "No, Dad... I already got the Sinatra playlist up." I swear I could hear him rolling his eyes.
Son, lemme tell ya... ain't none of that shit music you listen to gonna get you laid like Frank will. Trust me.
Looks like he's all ready to go, and Bridget should be there soon. Cate's giving him last-minute instructions for the pasta and for keeping the chicken warm. Nothing left to do but wish him good luck and tell him to have a nice night and be sure not to bust his curfew. And if tonight's the night, be smart and use a condom.
But I can't say that in front of Cate. He'll be embarrassed as Hell. That I'll text.
This whole thing makes me smile.
So Jess isn't the only one having a sweet, romantic night tonight. Cate and I just got back from dinner awhile ago. We had a lovely, somewhat quiet day today. Went out and did a little sightseeing and shopping, which would have been perfect if we hadn't been interrupted at least a dozen times for photos and autographs.
I don't normally mind if it happens once or twice, but by the fifth time Cate had to squeeze my hand and give me that little "be nice" reminder in my ear. When we had a minute alone she reminded me that I'm the reason this city is crawling with women from all over the planet, and of course when they get their chance to touch me or talk to me they're gonna.
She also said she'll kick their asses if they try to cop a feel, ha ha.
So I did the grin-and-bear-it routine and tried to enjoy a lovely summer afternoon with my Wife. And aside from feeling like I was the target of a bad surveillance op, it was nice. Cate and I bought a beautiful blown-glass bowl, and I couldn't resist buying her a silver necklace.
She always teases me that I enjoy buying her jewelry more than she enjoys getting it, and she might be right. There's something about picking out something pretty for the woman you love that just makes a guy feel Manly, ha ha. But she was sincere when she gave me a thank you kiss right there in the store.
Cate bought me a present, too. We were in this little stationery store where she was looking around for cards for a couple of her friends. They had these beautiful tooled-leather bound journals, with thick, gilt-edged pages. The covers had these ornate scrolled designs, every one different. She saw me looking at one and told the clerk to add it to her purchases, the Sneak.
Later when we were having gelato she gave it to me. She said she noticed this old book is getting pretty worn out, and it's almost full. And she thought it might be a fitting start to the first day of the rest of our post-tour life to start with a fresh blank page.
I love that idea.
So after an afternoon of leisure we came back and got dressed up to go out again, this time for a little celebration. Cate's birthday is tomorrow but with all the hoopla surrounding the Last Show we're gonna be all kinds of busy. There will be about a bazillion special guests and business people to entertain and the obligatory hands to shake and photos to take and champagne bottles to pop.
I didn't want to try to steal a minute with her tomorrow when I'll be pulled in a billion directions, and not be able to do it. So we went out to celebrate tonight. We had wonderful food and wine and dancing to Spanish guitar music. And then we came back here to continue our celebration... until Jesse called.
One of the pitfalls of Parenting, ha ha. No matter their age, somehow the Kids always know how to interrupt at just the right moment.
And we'll still do a little something special for Cate tomorrow. I asked Dawn to order up a birthday cake and to have the chef make something special for dinner before the show. We'll all sing Happy Birthday and have her blow out the candles. And I'll chuckle at the wonderment I know will be in her smile as she looks around and realizes her very favorite rock band in the world showed up to her birthday party.
Ain't that every Girl's dream? Ha ha.
In just a few more minutes it will officially be Cate's birthday. And it will officially be my last day of work for awhile. Reasons for us both to celebrate.
Friday, July 29
6:45 pm
Venue
Goofing backstage with the Boys and our Girls. A little mini-celebration pre-show. Everybody's families are here, for these last two shows of the Tour From Hell. Mama Joan brought Ava over, Ali and Little Teek are here, as is Kelly. Davey's kids aren't here yet -- they get in tomorrow -- but Lexi's been with us awhile.
And of course, My Cate.
The only thing that would make this more perfect is if my Kids were here. I'm a little sad they're not, but at the same time I'm glad to share this with just Cate. It's her first tour with me, her first Last Show.
And then it's just her and me on an island with a beach. Heaven.
Gonna let her pick the Cookie tonight too. We'll see if she gets a dirty one. If not, I'll make one up for her. She laughed at me when I showed her my Cookie-Poem from Barcelona. Apparently that E.E. poet is NOT the guy who invented Winnie the Pooh. That was A.A. Milne.
E.E., A.A, whatever. They're both vowels.
But I guess I am a little relieved it wasn't the same poet. I'd never be able to look at Pooh Bear the same way again, ha ha.
7:45 pm
Dressing Room
Just kicked Cate out of my dressing room. Cone of silence time. Gotta get my head on straight for the show, and she was completely distracting me.
She even made my fortune come true. It said "I may be Easy, but you're Hard."
That Cookie is SMART. Heh heh.
Venue
Goofing backstage with the Boys and our Girls. A little mini-celebration pre-show. Everybody's families are here, for these last two shows of the Tour From Hell. Mama Joan brought Ava over, Ali and Little Teek are here, as is Kelly. Davey's kids aren't here yet -- they get in tomorrow -- but Lexi's been with us awhile.
And of course, My Cate.
The only thing that would make this more perfect is if my Kids were here. I'm a little sad they're not, but at the same time I'm glad to share this with just Cate. It's her first tour with me, her first Last Show.
And then it's just her and me on an island with a beach. Heaven.
Gonna let her pick the Cookie tonight too. We'll see if she gets a dirty one. If not, I'll make one up for her. She laughed at me when I showed her my Cookie-Poem from Barcelona. Apparently that E.E. poet is NOT the guy who invented Winnie the Pooh. That was A.A. Milne.
E.E., A.A, whatever. They're both vowels.
But I guess I am a little relieved it wasn't the same poet. I'd never be able to look at Pooh Bear the same way again, ha ha.
7:45 pm
Dressing Room
Just kicked Cate out of my dressing room. Cone of silence time. Gotta get my head on straight for the show, and she was completely distracting me.
She even made my fortune come true. It said "I may be Easy, but you're Hard."
That Cookie is SMART. Heh heh.
Thursday, July 28
9:40 am
Car
On my way to the airport to pick up my Wife. I feel like a goofy teenage kid, all nervous and excited to see his Girl. I'm Jess, ha ha.
I love that she makes me feel this way.
I talked to Cate after the show last night; she was in the air but was able to watch the SatFeed of the show. She said she loved that I pulled out the "Don Juan" thing with Roses. The First Class cabin flight attendants were watching along with her on her iPad and oohing and aahing and sighing. They didn't know Cate was my wife, but they were really impressed with her ability to "intercept" the SatFeed, ha ha. Like she's some kinda Nerd-Genius.
Gotta love that internet access in First Class these days. I can make stewardesses swoon at 38,000 feet over the Atlantic. Heh heh.
Cate giggled when I bragged about that. Then she called me "Juan-y Bongiovi," ha ha. My Funny Girl.
In less than an hour she'll be in my arms. In an hour she'll be in my suite. Naked, if I have any say in the matter. Somehow I don't think she'll argue, heh heh.
We're just gonna hide away for a few hours and get reacquainted, then maybe hit the pool or go wander the City. Maybe I'll buy her a rose and sing to her in Spanish.
Whatever we do, this grin is gonna be stuck to my face for the next 2 weeks.
11:55 pm
Suite
Sitting out here on the terrace in the Spanish night air, sipping a glass of sangria. Watching through the open doors as my gorgeous Wife slips out of that pretty red dress she wore tonight.
She knows I'm watching. I can tell by her sexy little smile. She's taking her time, undressing slowly. Teasing me. Putting on a show.
She didn't take off her high heels. She knows it drives me crazy to see her in those sexy shoes.
She's taking off her jewelry, tilting her head to the side like she does as she takes out her earrings. I used to wonder why she did that, but I get it now. So her fingers don't get tangled up in her hair.
Her hair. It's beautiful. Long and shiny and thick... I love to feel her hair spread out over my chest. It's like satin.
And now she's working on the dress. She's turned her back to me, swept her hair over her shoulder so she can undo the tie around her neck, the straps of her halter dress. There they go...
She's turned to the side a little so I can see her beautiful body in silhouette. Her breasts are exquisite, full and tanned and tight-nippled. The top of her dress is bunched around her waist.
She just gave me a sly little look over her shoulder, and now she's got her hands at her waist.
She turned her back to me again. And now she's wiggling her hips, shimmying the dress down... to the floor. And in a completely unnecessary and unladylike but oh-so-fucking-hot tease of a move... she's bending over to pick it up.
Fuck, she's got a great ass.
And those stockings... and those red lace panties... she's killing me.
What a way to go.
Now she's facing me. Smiling. Posing. For me. Hands on her hips, hip cocked to one side, her toes turned in just a little to flex her quads and her calves in those red platform peep-toes... Sweet Jesus.
And her hair down over her breasts, her nipples peeking through the mahogany waves. So beautiful.
She has the rose I gave her earlier tucked behind her ear.
And here she comes. A slow little sashay, a little roll to her hips. She's been practicing. Maybe it's the pole dance lessons, ha ha.
Fuck, she's sexy.
Out here to the terrace. The breeze ruffling her hair. It's a little chilly, her nipples are getting tighter. She says it's refreshing.
She's on my lap. Sitting primly on my knee, one long leg crossed over the other. Those stockings are just unbelievably fucking hot.
She's sipping my sangria. All my senses are wrapped up in Her. The heat from her body. The smell of her perfume. The musk of her flesh. The electricity of her touch.
The sweet taste of her lips.
God, I missed her.
Car
On my way to the airport to pick up my Wife. I feel like a goofy teenage kid, all nervous and excited to see his Girl. I'm Jess, ha ha.
I love that she makes me feel this way.
I talked to Cate after the show last night; she was in the air but was able to watch the SatFeed of the show. She said she loved that I pulled out the "Don Juan" thing with Roses. The First Class cabin flight attendants were watching along with her on her iPad and oohing and aahing and sighing. They didn't know Cate was my wife, but they were really impressed with her ability to "intercept" the SatFeed, ha ha. Like she's some kinda Nerd-Genius.
Gotta love that internet access in First Class these days. I can make stewardesses swoon at 38,000 feet over the Atlantic. Heh heh.
Cate giggled when I bragged about that. Then she called me "Juan-y Bongiovi," ha ha. My Funny Girl.
In less than an hour she'll be in my arms. In an hour she'll be in my suite. Naked, if I have any say in the matter. Somehow I don't think she'll argue, heh heh.
We're just gonna hide away for a few hours and get reacquainted, then maybe hit the pool or go wander the City. Maybe I'll buy her a rose and sing to her in Spanish.
Whatever we do, this grin is gonna be stuck to my face for the next 2 weeks.
11:55 pm
Suite
Sitting out here on the terrace in the Spanish night air, sipping a glass of sangria. Watching through the open doors as my gorgeous Wife slips out of that pretty red dress she wore tonight.
She knows I'm watching. I can tell by her sexy little smile. She's taking her time, undressing slowly. Teasing me. Putting on a show.
She didn't take off her high heels. She knows it drives me crazy to see her in those sexy shoes.
She's taking off her jewelry, tilting her head to the side like she does as she takes out her earrings. I used to wonder why she did that, but I get it now. So her fingers don't get tangled up in her hair.
Her hair. It's beautiful. Long and shiny and thick... I love to feel her hair spread out over my chest. It's like satin.
And now she's working on the dress. She's turned her back to me, swept her hair over her shoulder so she can undo the tie around her neck, the straps of her halter dress. There they go...
She's turned to the side a little so I can see her beautiful body in silhouette. Her breasts are exquisite, full and tanned and tight-nippled. The top of her dress is bunched around her waist.
She just gave me a sly little look over her shoulder, and now she's got her hands at her waist.
She turned her back to me again. And now she's wiggling her hips, shimmying the dress down... to the floor. And in a completely unnecessary and unladylike but oh-so-fucking-hot tease of a move... she's bending over to pick it up.
Fuck, she's got a great ass.
And those stockings... and those red lace panties... she's killing me.
What a way to go.
Now she's facing me. Smiling. Posing. For me. Hands on her hips, hip cocked to one side, her toes turned in just a little to flex her quads and her calves in those red platform peep-toes... Sweet Jesus.
And her hair down over her breasts, her nipples peeking through the mahogany waves. So beautiful.
She has the rose I gave her earlier tucked behind her ear.
And here she comes. A slow little sashay, a little roll to her hips. She's been practicing. Maybe it's the pole dance lessons, ha ha.
Fuck, she's sexy.
Out here to the terrace. The breeze ruffling her hair. It's a little chilly, her nipples are getting tighter. She says it's refreshing.
She's on my lap. Sitting primly on my knee, one long leg crossed over the other. Those stockings are just unbelievably fucking hot.
She's sipping my sangria. All my senses are wrapped up in Her. The heat from her body. The smell of her perfume. The musk of her flesh. The electricity of her touch.
The sweet taste of her lips.
God, I missed her.
Wednesday, July 27
12:45 pm
Suite
God, I love football.
Been watching ESPN nonstop all morning. Thank God for the internet or I'd have to watch it in Spanish, ha ha. Camps opening today, free agent signings, trades and rumors. It's all good.
And MAN is my Wife gonna be pissed if the Eagles sign Favre.
4:45 pm
Van
On my way to Soundcheck, just talked to my Baby. She's packing and taking care of a few last-minute things, getting ready to come see me. In a few hours she's heading for the airport.
Tomorrow morning I'll be picking her up from the plane. Can hardly wait. She said she'll take a taxi, but no fucking way. I'm picking her up in a car. With a privacy screen. And them I'm gonna kiss her all the way back to the hotel.
And I was right, she IS pissed at the idea of Favre being an Eagle, ha ha.
7:40 pm
Dressing Room
"I like slowly stroking
The shocking fuzz
Of your electric fur/
And when what-it-is comes
Over parting flesh."
- E.E. Cummings
WTF? The Cookie is doing poetry now? And dirty poetry at that!
And isn't that the guy who created Winnie the Pooh? That's a disturbing thought.
Gotta be Lemma.
Suite
God, I love football.
Been watching ESPN nonstop all morning. Thank God for the internet or I'd have to watch it in Spanish, ha ha. Camps opening today, free agent signings, trades and rumors. It's all good.
And MAN is my Wife gonna be pissed if the Eagles sign Favre.
4:45 pm
Van
On my way to Soundcheck, just talked to my Baby. She's packing and taking care of a few last-minute things, getting ready to come see me. In a few hours she's heading for the airport.
Tomorrow morning I'll be picking her up from the plane. Can hardly wait. She said she'll take a taxi, but no fucking way. I'm picking her up in a car. With a privacy screen. And them I'm gonna kiss her all the way back to the hotel.
And I was right, she IS pissed at the idea of Favre being an Eagle, ha ha.
7:40 pm
Dressing Room
"I like slowly stroking
The shocking fuzz
Of your electric fur/
And when what-it-is comes
Over parting flesh."
- E.E. Cummings
WTF? The Cookie is doing poetry now? And dirty poetry at that!
And isn't that the guy who created Winnie the Pooh? That's a disturbing thought.
Gotta be Lemma.
Tuesday, July 26
7:10 pm
Terrace
I love this city. Beautiful, laid-back, and vibrant all at the same time. The art, the culture, the food, the wine... all wonderful.
Can't wait to share it with Cate. Two more sleeps then she's here. Then there won't be much sleeping at all, heh heh.
Had one of those great, relaxing, lazy days today. Went out for a run, came back and hung by the pool for awhile, read, talked to my Kids. I was basically a Bum, Ha ha. Didn't even bother to shave.
Spent a lot of time on the phone with Jess. He was chatty today, in a good mood. He's got a date tonight. With MY Girl. WTF is up with that? Old Man goes away for work and the Kid moves in on my Wife, ha ha.
Naw, I think it's awesome what Jess and Cate are doing tonight. She told me about it Sunday when we talked, that Jesse asked her to teach him how to make a special dish so he could cook up a romantic dinner for Bridget before she has to go off to college.
That's my Renaissance Man -- football camp by day, cooking lessons by night, ha ha.
Cate's taking off work a little early and she and Jess are going to the Italian market, then she's gonna teach him how to make her Chicken Saltimbocca recipe. My favorite, with the fresh angel hair pasta and arugula salad. Yum. And here I sit in Spain, drooling over Italian food. Ha ha.
When Jess asked me what I thought Bridget would think about him doing something "kinda girly" for her, I didn't know quite what he meant. But when I heard his plan, I actually almost patted myself on the back. My Son is a GENIUS when it comes to romance, ha ha. I was nowhere near that savvy when it came to Girls back in The Day. I basically showed off on stage, bought 'em wine coolers, then begged and whined and sweet-talked until they let me in their pants.
But Jess... the Kid is good. And the best thing is that he's sincere. He wants to do something romantic for his Girl because he's head over heels for her, and he wants to treat her like a Lady. That's what really makes me proud, though I gotta admit I can't take much of the credit. Dorothea has really raised Jess to be a young Gentleman.
When he's not being a bonehead, anyway.
So my chat with Jess today was also the first chance I've had to get the details on the Big Date; when I called Sunday he was over at Bridget's place for dinner. He got to officially meet the parents, ha ha. Not like he didn't already know who they are from Steph's and Bridget's school activities.
Still, it's a Big Deal being invited to have dinner with your Girl's family. Hope he passed the Shotgun Test, ha ha. Knowing Jess he was suave and charming. Probably had Bridget's Mom eating out of the palm of his hand. The Kid's got my genes, after all. Ha ha. I was always able to charm the Mamas. They always thought I was a nice Catholic boy, even with my long hair and my tight pants. I was a good actor, even back then.
Jesse said the whole weekend was great, he had a nice time at Bridget's house. But he didn't want to talk much about that. He was obviously over the moon, but not because he got to Meet the Parents.
The Birthday Date was perfect. The show was fantastic, the dinner was wonderful. And Bridget loved the ring. She cried. Because she was happy, not because Jess did something stupid, ha ha.
I had to bite my tongue to keep from saying what I was really thinking when Jess told me Bridget cried. Oh Shit. You didn't say "I Love You" did you? I mean, I'm all for love. It's the most powerful emotion on Earth. But when a 16-year-old guy tells an 18-year-old girl he loves her, or vice versa, that's pretty much the pinnacle of the relationship. Things usually go downhill from there.
Well, I didn't ask and Jess didn't offer. But I get the feeling there were no declarations of undying devotion, no Romeo and Juliet pacts. Just a whole lot of kissin' and squeezin' and feelin' up, Ha ha.
And then Jess told me something that shocked the Hell out of me. He and Bridget still haven't had sex... and she's a virgin.
How can that be? She's 18, heading off to college, and she's never.....
Wait, she's the same age as Steph. And I'm positive my Princess' virtue is still intact. At least that's what I choose to believe. I refuse to consider other options, even with Brendan the full-time boyfriend in the picture.
I like Bridget a lot, but watching that girl operate I would never have thought she was anything but... Experienced, I guess is the word. She's so self-confident and together and calm for a teenager. She carries herself with such composure, but with this kinda worldly self-assuredness. The girl just oozes sex appeal.
I feel like a Dirty Old Man writing that. But she does. Bridget is sexier than girls in their 20's. Hell, than women twice her age. It's because she's got all the B's -- Brains, Balls, and Beauty. It's easy to see why Jess is totally under her spell. Hell, if I was younger I would be too. I think I am now, a little. Ha ha.
I guess it's not hard to see why I like her. Bridget reminds me of how Dorothea was back when we were kids. And of how I imagine Cate must have been. I've always been a sucker for strong women, and I guess the apple doesn't fall far from the tree.
There's something a little Oedipal about that, ain't there? Ha ha.
So this Girl, who has kept her chastity through 13 years of school and Lord knows how many suitors and boyfriends, has eyes only for my Son. He took her on a romantic birthday date, he met her parents. She's wearing his ring. She's heading off to Princeton in less than a month. Jesse's asked his Stepmama to teach him to make Bridget a special dish.
It don't take a Rocket Scientist to see where this is going.
And I feel like I need to help Jess along. Despite my earlier decree, and despite the fact that I know Dorothea will probably chew my ass if she finds out about this. But I did it anyway.
I asked Jess when he was planning to cook for Miss Bridget. He kinda hemmed and hawed around, then said maybe this weekend or next. He wasn't sure where he was going to do it, now that Dorothea's changed her plans with Ted. (Which was news to me since D hasn't bothered to call me and tell me that yet).
Apparently Jess was hoping when the Chuckles were out in the Hamptons with me and his Mama was out of town he'd have the house to himself for an evening. But now that plans have changed, he may have to play Emeril for Bridget at her folks' place. He was a little nervous about that, which I get.
After all, it ain't easy being romantic when Daddy's in the next room, ha ha.
I felt bad for the Kid. So I caved. I told him I'd have to check with Cate first to be sure she's okay with it, and that he couldn't dime me out to his Mother, but it was okay with me if he wanted to have his romantic date at my place, since it will be empty the next couple weeks. I could hear the relief in his voice when he thanked me and called me Awesome.
I am Awesome, ha ha. But that's not why I told Jess he could use the apartment, to be a Cool Dad. It's because I understand how hard it is when you're about to be apart from the Girl that is the center of your whole world. You want to make every moment special, to hang on to it all. And you want to share it in that intense, intimate way that only two kids in love can.
And you can't do that when you constantly have people around. I don't just mean sexually, though I have a feeling that's what's gonna happen with Jess and Bridget. I just mean privately.
And if they decide Jess is gonna be Bridget's first, I don't want them to have to fumble around in a backseat or under a pier somewhere, where it's uncomfortable and rushed and not-so-romantic and maybe not even safe. Don't get me wrong -- I have great memories from under the boardwalk and in the backseat of my old beat-up ride. But those are from a different time.
I guess it's me really being The Dad when I realize I want Jess -- both of those kids -- to be safe first and foremost. And if that means looking the other way from my previous edict that there would be more no Gettin' It On under my roof... well, I'm okay with that.
I told Jess to be smart, be discrete, and that I expect him to respect our home. No parties, no other guests. Only Bridget. And I'm pretty sure he got the subliminal message in my Dad-lecture tone that my and Cate's bedroom is off-limits, ha ha. At least I hope so.
I know Cate will understand and agree with me when I tell her about my deal with Jess, especially about me wanting them to be safe. She may not be a biological parent yet, but she gets my Kids. She and Jess seem to have a special bond, one that's a little different from what she shares with Steph or the Little Guys. I know that's why Jess asked her to teach him to cook instead of Dorothea.
Well, that and Cate's a much better cook than Dorothea ever was or will be, ha ha.
So, tonight during our Skype date I'll bring Cate up to speed on my conversation with Jess, and she can tell me how the cooking lesson went. Then we'll have a little dessert together of our own.
Terrace
I love this city. Beautiful, laid-back, and vibrant all at the same time. The art, the culture, the food, the wine... all wonderful.
Can't wait to share it with Cate. Two more sleeps then she's here. Then there won't be much sleeping at all, heh heh.
Had one of those great, relaxing, lazy days today. Went out for a run, came back and hung by the pool for awhile, read, talked to my Kids. I was basically a Bum, Ha ha. Didn't even bother to shave.
Spent a lot of time on the phone with Jess. He was chatty today, in a good mood. He's got a date tonight. With MY Girl. WTF is up with that? Old Man goes away for work and the Kid moves in on my Wife, ha ha.
Naw, I think it's awesome what Jess and Cate are doing tonight. She told me about it Sunday when we talked, that Jesse asked her to teach him how to make a special dish so he could cook up a romantic dinner for Bridget before she has to go off to college.
That's my Renaissance Man -- football camp by day, cooking lessons by night, ha ha.
Cate's taking off work a little early and she and Jess are going to the Italian market, then she's gonna teach him how to make her Chicken Saltimbocca recipe. My favorite, with the fresh angel hair pasta and arugula salad. Yum. And here I sit in Spain, drooling over Italian food. Ha ha.
When Jess asked me what I thought Bridget would think about him doing something "kinda girly" for her, I didn't know quite what he meant. But when I heard his plan, I actually almost patted myself on the back. My Son is a GENIUS when it comes to romance, ha ha. I was nowhere near that savvy when it came to Girls back in The Day. I basically showed off on stage, bought 'em wine coolers, then begged and whined and sweet-talked until they let me in their pants.
But Jess... the Kid is good. And the best thing is that he's sincere. He wants to do something romantic for his Girl because he's head over heels for her, and he wants to treat her like a Lady. That's what really makes me proud, though I gotta admit I can't take much of the credit. Dorothea has really raised Jess to be a young Gentleman.
When he's not being a bonehead, anyway.
So my chat with Jess today was also the first chance I've had to get the details on the Big Date; when I called Sunday he was over at Bridget's place for dinner. He got to officially meet the parents, ha ha. Not like he didn't already know who they are from Steph's and Bridget's school activities.
Still, it's a Big Deal being invited to have dinner with your Girl's family. Hope he passed the Shotgun Test, ha ha. Knowing Jess he was suave and charming. Probably had Bridget's Mom eating out of the palm of his hand. The Kid's got my genes, after all. Ha ha. I was always able to charm the Mamas. They always thought I was a nice Catholic boy, even with my long hair and my tight pants. I was a good actor, even back then.
Jesse said the whole weekend was great, he had a nice time at Bridget's house. But he didn't want to talk much about that. He was obviously over the moon, but not because he got to Meet the Parents.
The Birthday Date was perfect. The show was fantastic, the dinner was wonderful. And Bridget loved the ring. She cried. Because she was happy, not because Jess did something stupid, ha ha.
I had to bite my tongue to keep from saying what I was really thinking when Jess told me Bridget cried. Oh Shit. You didn't say "I Love You" did you? I mean, I'm all for love. It's the most powerful emotion on Earth. But when a 16-year-old guy tells an 18-year-old girl he loves her, or vice versa, that's pretty much the pinnacle of the relationship. Things usually go downhill from there.
Well, I didn't ask and Jess didn't offer. But I get the feeling there were no declarations of undying devotion, no Romeo and Juliet pacts. Just a whole lot of kissin' and squeezin' and feelin' up, Ha ha.
And then Jess told me something that shocked the Hell out of me. He and Bridget still haven't had sex... and she's a virgin.
How can that be? She's 18, heading off to college, and she's never.....
Wait, she's the same age as Steph. And I'm positive my Princess' virtue is still intact. At least that's what I choose to believe. I refuse to consider other options, even with Brendan the full-time boyfriend in the picture.
I like Bridget a lot, but watching that girl operate I would never have thought she was anything but... Experienced, I guess is the word. She's so self-confident and together and calm for a teenager. She carries herself with such composure, but with this kinda worldly self-assuredness. The girl just oozes sex appeal.
I feel like a Dirty Old Man writing that. But she does. Bridget is sexier than girls in their 20's. Hell, than women twice her age. It's because she's got all the B's -- Brains, Balls, and Beauty. It's easy to see why Jess is totally under her spell. Hell, if I was younger I would be too. I think I am now, a little. Ha ha.
I guess it's not hard to see why I like her. Bridget reminds me of how Dorothea was back when we were kids. And of how I imagine Cate must have been. I've always been a sucker for strong women, and I guess the apple doesn't fall far from the tree.
There's something a little Oedipal about that, ain't there? Ha ha.
So this Girl, who has kept her chastity through 13 years of school and Lord knows how many suitors and boyfriends, has eyes only for my Son. He took her on a romantic birthday date, he met her parents. She's wearing his ring. She's heading off to Princeton in less than a month. Jesse's asked his Stepmama to teach him to make Bridget a special dish.
It don't take a Rocket Scientist to see where this is going.
And I feel like I need to help Jess along. Despite my earlier decree, and despite the fact that I know Dorothea will probably chew my ass if she finds out about this. But I did it anyway.
I asked Jess when he was planning to cook for Miss Bridget. He kinda hemmed and hawed around, then said maybe this weekend or next. He wasn't sure where he was going to do it, now that Dorothea's changed her plans with Ted. (Which was news to me since D hasn't bothered to call me and tell me that yet).
Apparently Jess was hoping when the Chuckles were out in the Hamptons with me and his Mama was out of town he'd have the house to himself for an evening. But now that plans have changed, he may have to play Emeril for Bridget at her folks' place. He was a little nervous about that, which I get.
After all, it ain't easy being romantic when Daddy's in the next room, ha ha.
I felt bad for the Kid. So I caved. I told him I'd have to check with Cate first to be sure she's okay with it, and that he couldn't dime me out to his Mother, but it was okay with me if he wanted to have his romantic date at my place, since it will be empty the next couple weeks. I could hear the relief in his voice when he thanked me and called me Awesome.
I am Awesome, ha ha. But that's not why I told Jess he could use the apartment, to be a Cool Dad. It's because I understand how hard it is when you're about to be apart from the Girl that is the center of your whole world. You want to make every moment special, to hang on to it all. And you want to share it in that intense, intimate way that only two kids in love can.
And you can't do that when you constantly have people around. I don't just mean sexually, though I have a feeling that's what's gonna happen with Jess and Bridget. I just mean privately.
And if they decide Jess is gonna be Bridget's first, I don't want them to have to fumble around in a backseat or under a pier somewhere, where it's uncomfortable and rushed and not-so-romantic and maybe not even safe. Don't get me wrong -- I have great memories from under the boardwalk and in the backseat of my old beat-up ride. But those are from a different time.
I guess it's me really being The Dad when I realize I want Jess -- both of those kids -- to be safe first and foremost. And if that means looking the other way from my previous edict that there would be more no Gettin' It On under my roof... well, I'm okay with that.
I told Jess to be smart, be discrete, and that I expect him to respect our home. No parties, no other guests. Only Bridget. And I'm pretty sure he got the subliminal message in my Dad-lecture tone that my and Cate's bedroom is off-limits, ha ha. At least I hope so.
I know Cate will understand and agree with me when I tell her about my deal with Jess, especially about me wanting them to be safe. She may not be a biological parent yet, but she gets my Kids. She and Jess seem to have a special bond, one that's a little different from what she shares with Steph or the Little Guys. I know that's why Jess asked her to teach him to cook instead of Dorothea.
Well, that and Cate's a much better cook than Dorothea ever was or will be, ha ha.
So, tonight during our Skype date I'll bring Cate up to speed on my conversation with Jess, and she can tell me how the cooking lesson went. Then we'll have a little dessert together of our own.
Monday, July 25
1:20 am
Plane
This is it. Officially in the last week of the tour. In an hour I'll be checking into my suite in Barcelona and starting the countdown until I'm unemployed again, Ha ha.
Three more shows. Seven more days. Then I'm a free man.
And I never have to wear that damned red Captain Crunch jacket again, Ha ha.
But even better yet, just three more days until my Baby gets here. Thursday she arrives. Gonna be the longest three days of my life and I'll probably be a complete pain in the ass to everybody around me, but we're down to hours now. About 84, in fact.
Can't wait.
So the beach show went pretty well tonight. We had to speed through it, make it shorter than usual because of curfew. That's the shitty thing about some of these unique outside shows. Sometimes the curfews are stricter than, say, Hyde Park. And the Belgians weren't fucking around when they said we're DONE by curfew.
That was fine by me, actually. I'm not quite feeling 100 percent. Last few shows have been great, but my chords are getting a little beat up. I know I'm doing it to myself, trying to pull off all those big numbers back to back to back. Plus it's been so damp and chilly that I think I have a touch of a cold. My tea's tasting mighty good on this old raw throat right at the moment.
Gotta get well quick. Can't be sick when Cate gets here. And hopefully it will be sunny and warm in Spain and some of that native Sangria will kill whatever I got brewing.
But with my luck it will probably fucking rain all damned week. At this point I'm about ready to trade in the Captain Crunch Coat for a scuba suit and flippers.
Apparently it's all sunny and summery back home. Cate's back in the City now; just got off Skype with her. We had Mile-High Skype, heh heh. She spent the afternoon floating in the pool, watching the show. And the iPad survived, ha ha. After that she played with her dog and puttered around the house a little, then headed back to the apartment. Stopped at her favorite diner on the way for dinner. A perfectly lazy, ordinary day. Except she missed me.
Miss you too, Baby.
Cate mentioned something that got me thinking. She said she's finding it really nice to to escape out to the Jersey house more often. She's getting tired of the City, of always being surrounded by the hustle and bustle. It's convenient for her work-wise, but she wishes we weren't always so "in the middle" of everything.
Maybe we should think of moving back out to Jersey, to making our place in the City just a pied-a-terre where we could stay when we want or need to. If Cate has to work late or has crazy hours she could stay there, but otherwise she could commute into the City. It's not a bad trip, especially if you don't have to do it during rush hour.
And I certainly have no reason to have to be in the middle of NYC. It's nice to be close to the Kids, but it's not like I'll see them every day once school starts anyway. The studio's out there; eventually we're gonna start writing again. Plus it's a helluva lot easier to get to Philly for Foundation business from Red Bank than it is from Manhattan.
And maybe if we move out to the Jersey House Cate will want to stay home more. Telework. And maybe even eventually not work, or at least change jobs. Take on full-time Mommyhood for awhile. Try on the role of suburban housewife, Ha ha.
Okay, maybe "suburban housewife" is taking it a bit too far. Especially in that neighborhood, Ha ha.
But still... maybe Cate's starting to realize she's ready. Ready to finally settle down, to leave behind the shitty hours and thankless job to follow her Heart instead of her logical cop Head. Ready to be the woman she never thought she'd want to be.
I love that idea. But I'm not quite sure how to approach it with her. Maybe this is a start... asking if she'd want to move out to the Jersey house, maybe in the fall when school starts.
Time to write a new chapter in that book of our lives.
Plane
This is it. Officially in the last week of the tour. In an hour I'll be checking into my suite in Barcelona and starting the countdown until I'm unemployed again, Ha ha.
Three more shows. Seven more days. Then I'm a free man.
And I never have to wear that damned red Captain Crunch jacket again, Ha ha.
But even better yet, just three more days until my Baby gets here. Thursday she arrives. Gonna be the longest three days of my life and I'll probably be a complete pain in the ass to everybody around me, but we're down to hours now. About 84, in fact.
Can't wait.
So the beach show went pretty well tonight. We had to speed through it, make it shorter than usual because of curfew. That's the shitty thing about some of these unique outside shows. Sometimes the curfews are stricter than, say, Hyde Park. And the Belgians weren't fucking around when they said we're DONE by curfew.
That was fine by me, actually. I'm not quite feeling 100 percent. Last few shows have been great, but my chords are getting a little beat up. I know I'm doing it to myself, trying to pull off all those big numbers back to back to back. Plus it's been so damp and chilly that I think I have a touch of a cold. My tea's tasting mighty good on this old raw throat right at the moment.
Gotta get well quick. Can't be sick when Cate gets here. And hopefully it will be sunny and warm in Spain and some of that native Sangria will kill whatever I got brewing.
But with my luck it will probably fucking rain all damned week. At this point I'm about ready to trade in the Captain Crunch Coat for a scuba suit and flippers.
Apparently it's all sunny and summery back home. Cate's back in the City now; just got off Skype with her. We had Mile-High Skype, heh heh. She spent the afternoon floating in the pool, watching the show. And the iPad survived, ha ha. After that she played with her dog and puttered around the house a little, then headed back to the apartment. Stopped at her favorite diner on the way for dinner. A perfectly lazy, ordinary day. Except she missed me.
Miss you too, Baby.
Cate mentioned something that got me thinking. She said she's finding it really nice to to escape out to the Jersey house more often. She's getting tired of the City, of always being surrounded by the hustle and bustle. It's convenient for her work-wise, but she wishes we weren't always so "in the middle" of everything.
Maybe we should think of moving back out to Jersey, to making our place in the City just a pied-a-terre where we could stay when we want or need to. If Cate has to work late or has crazy hours she could stay there, but otherwise she could commute into the City. It's not a bad trip, especially if you don't have to do it during rush hour.
And I certainly have no reason to have to be in the middle of NYC. It's nice to be close to the Kids, but it's not like I'll see them every day once school starts anyway. The studio's out there; eventually we're gonna start writing again. Plus it's a helluva lot easier to get to Philly for Foundation business from Red Bank than it is from Manhattan.
And maybe if we move out to the Jersey House Cate will want to stay home more. Telework. And maybe even eventually not work, or at least change jobs. Take on full-time Mommyhood for awhile. Try on the role of suburban housewife, Ha ha.
Okay, maybe "suburban housewife" is taking it a bit too far. Especially in that neighborhood, Ha ha.
But still... maybe Cate's starting to realize she's ready. Ready to finally settle down, to leave behind the shitty hours and thankless job to follow her Heart instead of her logical cop Head. Ready to be the woman she never thought she'd want to be.
I love that idea. But I'm not quite sure how to approach it with her. Maybe this is a start... asking if she'd want to move out to the Jersey house, maybe in the fall when school starts.
Time to write a new chapter in that book of our lives.
Sunday, July 24
6:55 pm
Dressing Room
I'm fucking freezing.
This is false advertising. Beach concert My Ass. No toes in the sand, pina coladas, and girls in bikinis here. It's only like 50 damned degrees.
Trying to close my eyes and picture sunny Sardinia, where there will definitely be toes in the sand and pina coladas and a girl in a bikini....
Cate and I finalized our plans this morning, had Renee book the villa. It was actually less of a challenge than I thought to get Cate to pick the place. Can't wait to see it in person -- private beach access, a huge garden, a gorgeous patio with a fountain and an outdoor dining room and a pool and a jacuzzi. And a stable.
Of course the horses are what sold it for Cate. Guess I'm going riding at some point. Maybe even on a horse, ha ha.
She's out at the Jersey house again today, just for a little mini-getaway. Decided late last night to drive out. That's where she called me from this morning; it was like 2 am there and she wasn't asleep because she had napped all afternoon. She said she plans to relax all day today, not do a damned thing.
Must be nice. In about an hour I gotta go shake my ass for a couple thousand leering women. Some of us have to work today. Sheesh.
In fact, my slacker Wife is in the pool right now on her floaty-chair thingie, sipping some kind of fruity drink and getting ready to watch the feed of the show on her iPad. Hope she doesn't get all excited when she sees her Sexy Husband shimmying all around the stage and drop it in the water, ha ha. Guess we'll find out if that waterproof case is really waterproof or not.
I know where she is because she just texted me a picture of her boobs. I could see the frame of the chair and the water when I stopped staring at her tits. Unfortunately they're covered by that bikini top I like, the turquoise one with the little beads on it. Fuck, she looks hot in that tiny little thing.
And I'm sitting her bundled up and shivering. Sometimes life just ain't fair.
Okay, time to open the Cookie. Cate told me to text her and tell her what it says. The one from last show was kinda lame. I think it might have been a veiled insult; you know, one of those things that sounds like a compliment but it really calls attention to your shortcomings?
And it wasn't even original: Everybody knows "It ain't the size of the boat, it's the motion of the ocean."
Trust me, I've been conjuring up the big waves to compensate for the dinghy in my pants for years, ha ha.
Alright, here goes...
"You are like gourmet coffee. You grind so fine."
Okay, I know that's a compliment. And it's 100% abso-fucking-lutely true. Let's see if my Wife agrees. And if she doesn't...
Maybe only the Cookie will get eaten. Heh heh.
Dressing Room
I'm fucking freezing.
This is false advertising. Beach concert My Ass. No toes in the sand, pina coladas, and girls in bikinis here. It's only like 50 damned degrees.
Trying to close my eyes and picture sunny Sardinia, where there will definitely be toes in the sand and pina coladas and a girl in a bikini....
Cate and I finalized our plans this morning, had Renee book the villa. It was actually less of a challenge than I thought to get Cate to pick the place. Can't wait to see it in person -- private beach access, a huge garden, a gorgeous patio with a fountain and an outdoor dining room and a pool and a jacuzzi. And a stable.
Of course the horses are what sold it for Cate. Guess I'm going riding at some point. Maybe even on a horse, ha ha.
She's out at the Jersey house again today, just for a little mini-getaway. Decided late last night to drive out. That's where she called me from this morning; it was like 2 am there and she wasn't asleep because she had napped all afternoon. She said she plans to relax all day today, not do a damned thing.
Must be nice. In about an hour I gotta go shake my ass for a couple thousand leering women. Some of us have to work today. Sheesh.
In fact, my slacker Wife is in the pool right now on her floaty-chair thingie, sipping some kind of fruity drink and getting ready to watch the feed of the show on her iPad. Hope she doesn't get all excited when she sees her Sexy Husband shimmying all around the stage and drop it in the water, ha ha. Guess we'll find out if that waterproof case is really waterproof or not.
I know where she is because she just texted me a picture of her boobs. I could see the frame of the chair and the water when I stopped staring at her tits. Unfortunately they're covered by that bikini top I like, the turquoise one with the little beads on it. Fuck, she looks hot in that tiny little thing.
And I'm sitting her bundled up and shivering. Sometimes life just ain't fair.
Okay, time to open the Cookie. Cate told me to text her and tell her what it says. The one from last show was kinda lame. I think it might have been a veiled insult; you know, one of those things that sounds like a compliment but it really calls attention to your shortcomings?
And it wasn't even original: Everybody knows "It ain't the size of the boat, it's the motion of the ocean."
Trust me, I've been conjuring up the big waves to compensate for the dinghy in my pants for years, ha ha.
Alright, here goes...
"You are like gourmet coffee. You grind so fine."
Okay, I know that's a compliment. And it's 100% abso-fucking-lutely true. Let's see if my Wife agrees. And if she doesn't...
Maybe only the Cookie will get eaten. Heh heh.
Saturday, July 23
5:35 pm
Suite
Another city, another suite. This one seems like a hole compared to that massive Penthouse in Vienna, ha ha. But it's not. It's very nice, as most of them are. Not like this is the Holiday Inn, ha ha.
Thank God I only have one more week of hotels left.
Talked to Cate from the plane. She was just getting home, worked straight through the night last night in the Command Center. Finally the office stood down a little, sent the Agents home. Though the Analysts are still... well, analyzing, I guess.
She said she was so tired she can't even sleep. To anybody else that might sound crazy, but I understand what she means. All that adrenaline takes awhile to work out of your system.
I missed having my Skype date with her last night. Made me realize how much I look forward to seeing her every day, even if it's only on camera. We probably won't have a date tonight either, if she's asleep. I told her not to worry about it, to take care of herself and call me when she wakes up. Then if she's up to it we can finalize our plans for Sardinia.
Renee did her usual bang-up job of finding some great places for me. She gave me a list of no less than 6 private villas that are available for week after next. They're all gorgeous, all wonderful options. Which of course means I can't choose one to save my life. Gonna have to defer to the Wife on this one. I'm sure she'll say "whatever you like, Baby," but I'm not letting her get away with that. She's making this call.
Talked to Jess earlier too. Today's his Big Day. Bridget's birthday. He's going all out for her; a box for Rain, dinner at Masa. He even bought her flowers and balloons and a cake. And somehow, despite his tattoo stunt, he convinced Dorothea to lift his curfew for the evening. I told Jess he better not come stumbling in at sunrise or that will never happen again, ha ha.
I hope Jess and Bridget have a perfect, romantic night. Every young couple deserves at least one, a special memory they can carry in their hearts forever. Even if they drift out of each other's lives at least they'll have something sweet to hold onto, so when they're my age they can look back and smile.
And speaking of Jesse's Mother, I told her I'm delaying my return from Europe so Cate and I can enjoy a little vacation. She was less than thrilled. She tried to play the guilt card, told me how disappointed Jake and Romey are gonna be that they have to wait an extra week to go out to the Hamptons house with me. When I told Dorothea they'll get over it, she did the "Well you're going to tell them, I'm not gonna be the Bad Guy" thing.
That kinda pissed me off. I didn't expect her to be so bitchy about this. And then the truth came out -- she and Ted scheduled a little getaway that week, since I'd have the Boys. Now they're either gonna have to change their plans or Dorothea's gonna have to come up with something else to do with Jake and Romey. Steph can't watch them, she's working. And D ain't leaving Jesse in charge.
I probably could have been a little less snarky when I told D that's not my problem that she made plans. After all, she didn't bother to tell me about them. And yeah, I get that they're none of my business, but then again, my plans with my Wife aren't really any of her business either. I could have just said "I'll be home on the 10th" and not told her why.
And then she hung up on me.
And this is why we got divorced.
Well, okay, not really... but still. How fucking rude.
D did text me about an hour later, apologizing for hanging up. It didn't sound much like an apology, but whatever. She can call me when she decides she wants to be civil. Until then, I'm not worrying about it. I'm just gonna plan MY romantic getaway with my Wife.
And in the meantime, I'm gonna go out with the Boys and find a good pint of Belgian beer.
Suite
Another city, another suite. This one seems like a hole compared to that massive Penthouse in Vienna, ha ha. But it's not. It's very nice, as most of them are. Not like this is the Holiday Inn, ha ha.
Thank God I only have one more week of hotels left.
Talked to Cate from the plane. She was just getting home, worked straight through the night last night in the Command Center. Finally the office stood down a little, sent the Agents home. Though the Analysts are still... well, analyzing, I guess.
She said she was so tired she can't even sleep. To anybody else that might sound crazy, but I understand what she means. All that adrenaline takes awhile to work out of your system.
I missed having my Skype date with her last night. Made me realize how much I look forward to seeing her every day, even if it's only on camera. We probably won't have a date tonight either, if she's asleep. I told her not to worry about it, to take care of herself and call me when she wakes up. Then if she's up to it we can finalize our plans for Sardinia.
Renee did her usual bang-up job of finding some great places for me. She gave me a list of no less than 6 private villas that are available for week after next. They're all gorgeous, all wonderful options. Which of course means I can't choose one to save my life. Gonna have to defer to the Wife on this one. I'm sure she'll say "whatever you like, Baby," but I'm not letting her get away with that. She's making this call.
Talked to Jess earlier too. Today's his Big Day. Bridget's birthday. He's going all out for her; a box for Rain, dinner at Masa. He even bought her flowers and balloons and a cake. And somehow, despite his tattoo stunt, he convinced Dorothea to lift his curfew for the evening. I told Jess he better not come stumbling in at sunrise or that will never happen again, ha ha.
I hope Jess and Bridget have a perfect, romantic night. Every young couple deserves at least one, a special memory they can carry in their hearts forever. Even if they drift out of each other's lives at least they'll have something sweet to hold onto, so when they're my age they can look back and smile.
And speaking of Jesse's Mother, I told her I'm delaying my return from Europe so Cate and I can enjoy a little vacation. She was less than thrilled. She tried to play the guilt card, told me how disappointed Jake and Romey are gonna be that they have to wait an extra week to go out to the Hamptons house with me. When I told Dorothea they'll get over it, she did the "Well you're going to tell them, I'm not gonna be the Bad Guy" thing.
That kinda pissed me off. I didn't expect her to be so bitchy about this. And then the truth came out -- she and Ted scheduled a little getaway that week, since I'd have the Boys. Now they're either gonna have to change their plans or Dorothea's gonna have to come up with something else to do with Jake and Romey. Steph can't watch them, she's working. And D ain't leaving Jesse in charge.
I probably could have been a little less snarky when I told D that's not my problem that she made plans. After all, she didn't bother to tell me about them. And yeah, I get that they're none of my business, but then again, my plans with my Wife aren't really any of her business either. I could have just said "I'll be home on the 10th" and not told her why.
And then she hung up on me.
And this is why we got divorced.
Well, okay, not really... but still. How fucking rude.
D did text me about an hour later, apologizing for hanging up. It didn't sound much like an apology, but whatever. She can call me when she decides she wants to be civil. Until then, I'm not worrying about it. I'm just gonna plan MY romantic getaway with my Wife.
And in the meantime, I'm gonna go out with the Boys and find a good pint of Belgian beer.
Friday, July 22
5:25 pm
Dressing Room
Glued to the news, watching the chaos in Oslo.
Unfuckingbelievable. It's like 9/11 again. On a much smaller scale, but equally as horrible. The scenes are terrifying. People filling the streets, running away from buildings.
And a second attack on a political camp of some kind. On teenagers. Kids the age of my son and daughter.
What the FUCK is wrong with this world?
In the news footage I can see the hotel where we stayed last month. It wasn't far from the government center at all.
Thank God we weren't there now. We easily could have been. Christ, first the thing with the hotel in Mexico City, now this. No wonder Cate's always worried about me when I travel. She knows way more about this sinister stuff than I do.
She texted almost immediately after it happened, to tell me she's going to be incommunicado for awhile. The whole US Government is of course going into crisis/defense mode. She couldn't say it, didn't have to. It doesn't take a rocket scientist to think "Terror Attack" the second you see this news. Cate said she won't be on Skype tonight, but she'll call when she can.
Chances are she'll be working through the weekend. As selfish as it sounds right now, I just hope this doesn't interfere with her vacation plans, with her coming here. I need to see her, to hug her and kiss her and let her tell me everything's okay, in our little corner of this nasty, fucked-up world.
And somehow I gotta tear myself away from this TV and get ready to go to work. The show's still gotta go on here in Vienna, even as Oslo burns.
Dressing Room
Glued to the news, watching the chaos in Oslo.
Unfuckingbelievable. It's like 9/11 again. On a much smaller scale, but equally as horrible. The scenes are terrifying. People filling the streets, running away from buildings.
And a second attack on a political camp of some kind. On teenagers. Kids the age of my son and daughter.
What the FUCK is wrong with this world?
In the news footage I can see the hotel where we stayed last month. It wasn't far from the government center at all.
Thank God we weren't there now. We easily could have been. Christ, first the thing with the hotel in Mexico City, now this. No wonder Cate's always worried about me when I travel. She knows way more about this sinister stuff than I do.
She texted almost immediately after it happened, to tell me she's going to be incommunicado for awhile. The whole US Government is of course going into crisis/defense mode. She couldn't say it, didn't have to. It doesn't take a rocket scientist to think "Terror Attack" the second you see this news. Cate said she won't be on Skype tonight, but she'll call when she can.
Chances are she'll be working through the weekend. As selfish as it sounds right now, I just hope this doesn't interfere with her vacation plans, with her coming here. I need to see her, to hug her and kiss her and let her tell me everything's okay, in our little corner of this nasty, fucked-up world.
And somehow I gotta tear myself away from this TV and get ready to go to work. The show's still gotta go on here in Vienna, even as Oslo burns.
Thursday, July 21
2:45 am
Suite
Had to postpone my date for tonight. An hour later than usual, since we were flying.
Athens was a great night. A historic night. Man, that crowd was something else. Just on the edge of wild and unruly. Amazing energy. But I just couldn't quite channel it like usual. I just felt a little off-kilter. The show was still great, but I just wasn't in the mood to banter and go off-the-cuff like I have lately.
Guess I'm still a little wrapped up in myself.
Just got to Vienna, made it to the hotel. A new place this time; haven't stayed here before. This room is just un-fucking-believable. Absolutely beautiful, and HUGE. It's like staying in a palace. Which I've done before, so I should know, ha ha.
When Cate Skypes I'm gonna have to carry my iPad around and show her the place. She'll love it. Christ, we could live in just the bathroom for at least a month. There's a fucking couch in there! And a giant plasma TV mounted on the wall. Just gotta call up room service and we're set. Ha ha.
Too bad I won't be able to entice her to jump on a plane and be here by dinner tomorrow to share it with me.
But, we're in the home stretch now. One more week, then Cate's here. We're together for good. Or at least until she has to go out on her next long-term Op.
Which I hope is never.
I've been thinking all night about how things will be when I get back home. There's always an adjustment period, a month or so until my body realizes it's done with the Vampire life and the Rock Star routine. For the first couple weeks I feel like I've been lobotomized. My brain just won't work. It's all I can do to put my shoes on the right feet.
Then I go through the physical breakdown; fatigue, aches and pains, lethargy. But as much as I've been beat up on this tour maybe I've already made it through that cycle, ha ha.
Then comes the wandering-aimlessly-around-the-house phase. When I can't quite figure out what to do with myself. I'm not bored, I have NO desire to do anything related to music; I just have no idea how to live a day-to-day life. The Kids' school routines used to help when I lived with them, but once I moved out I lost that normalcy. And somehow I have a feeling living with Cate ain't gonna be much better when it comes to routine. Her hours can be wacky; she can run off at moments' notice.
But hopefully having me home will anchor her more, make her keep the work/home balance a little more sane. Maybe we can work more closely on some of the Foundation stuff, get into something she's passionate about. Maybe take on more Veterans' projects.
She'd love that; the thing she did last winter with Ken was fantastic. Wounded Warriors is a cause near and dear to Cate's heart. Kinda like Dorothea and the Kitchen. Everybody has the cause that speaks to them, especially when there's a personal connection.
And maybe I can slowly wean her away from that damned dangerous job, convince her to consider something else career-wise.
Like full-time Motherhood.
But I'm not gonna bring that up now. There will be plenty of time to talk later. After this tour, after our vacation, after she's pregnant.
And speak of the Angel... there she is, calling my Skype early.
Hello, Baby.
11:30 pm
Suite
Sitting out here on my balcony, enjoying a glass of wine and looking out over the most beautiful city in Europe. Vienna is just gorgeous. Another place to add to the bucket list. Only I think I'd like to come back here in the winter, when everything's blanketed with snow and looks like it belongs in a fairy tale.
Had a nice day off today, did some touristy stuff. Stuff Cate would love. She's gonna be SO jealous when I tell her what Renee set us up with.
We spent the afternoon at the Vienna Riding School. The place where they train the world's finest Lippizaner horses. It's literally inside the Imperial Hofburg Palace, and it's stunning.
When Steph went through her horse-crazy phase back when she was a little girl Dorothea and Mom took her to see the Lippizaners at Madison Square Garden. I remember her chattering about them nonstop for months. And she took the stuffed horse Mom bought her EVERYWHERE. She still has it, in her room.
Wonder if she'll take it to college?
Well, what we saw today was nothing short of incredible. We went for a tour of the School and of the stable, and watched part of a training session. After a fantastic lunch we were seated in the Prince's Box to watch a performance. It was a special show, something they don't do anywhere else but here.
And it was glorious. I swear, when they say ballet on horseback they ain't kidding. Classical music, choreography, traditional costumes. And those horses were something else. Half-ton beasts that danced around like they were lighter than air, with rippling muscles and flying manes and tails. It was like watching statues come to life. But then after the show when we went back to the stables, those giant creatures were snuffling my pockets, looking for carrots and peppermints just like one of Bruce's ponies back on his farm in Jersey.
Incredible.
I took a ton of photos, and I bought Cate a souvenir. It's an alabaster statue of one of the most renowned Lippizaner studs in history, a stallion that was considered to be the perfect specimen. It's a beautiful piece of art, capturing the horse reared up, performing the courbette.
And it's huge and heavy as hell, ha ha. It's gonna be delivered to the hotel so we can take it on the plane. Would cost a fortune to ship home air freight. Plus I don't want to risk it being damaged.
I thought maybe I'd put it in Cate's new office, the one I'm gonna have remodeled for her in the Jersey house. I thought a lot about it today, and decided I'm going to do it. I even made the effort to email that decorator Dorothea likes so much.
That will be my project when I recover from this tour. Designing Cate's office. And maybe redoing a few other rooms too. Maybe I'll take up interior design as a hobby. Or as my new career, ha ha.
Hey, I was a pretty damned good fashion model. I got an eye for matching stuff. I could do it if I wanted to.
Anyway, I bought stuff at the Riding School for the Kids too. Not ginormous statutes, but some pretty cool stuff. A DVD of the history of the school and the performance, a couple horse and rider models for the Chuckleheads (which will probably be turned into knights or medieval warriors or something, knowing them), and a pretty crystal pendant for Steph.
I didn't quite know what to get Jess so I got him a commemorative medallion and this replica of that Napoleon-looking hat the riders wear. If he hates it he can always give it to his brothers. Or to Bridget, ha ha.
I also picked up something special for somebody else. It's the most beautiful music box I've ever seen, with a horse jumping into the air in the capriole on top, which revolves to the Vienna Waltz. All around the base are hand-painted depictions of the Lippizaners performing the other Airs.
For my Little Roxy. Someday she'll be able to look at it and know how much her Daddy loved her even before she existed.
So after our wonderful afternoon we all came back and got ready to go out to an equally wonderful dinner, at which I ate way too much. I swear, everything they cook in Austria is rich. Even the vegetables. But it was all delicious, as was the dessert.
Grilled chicken, salad, and water for me tomorrow. And a bunch of laps in that huge indoor pool they have downstairs.
Talked to Stephie a little earlier. She had the day off from the Parrot, spent it on the beach with some friends. She said it was 100+ degrees today, even by the water. I like it hot, but that just sounds awful. Steph said it wasn't so bad, the ocean was so warm it was like swimming in the Caribbean.
She also kinda giggled and told me there's some new guy in town, who has been hanging around the Parrot trying to talk Steph out of her phone number. Apparently he'll be a Sophomore at NYU this fall, he's out in the Hamptons at his Dad and Stepmom's place, and he's "really funny and super-cute."
I had to raise an eyebrow at that comment. Could it be that Brendan has competition? When I asked Steph that she just did that embarrassed little squealy-giggly thing I think all teenage girls do. "DAAAAAAAD! Stop it! We're just frieeeeends!" Ha ha.
But now I'm intrigued. I don't quite know what to think. On the one hand, it wouldn't be the end of the world if Steph and Brendan broke up since they're both going off to different colleges next month. Chances are the distance will take its toll and they'll grow apart anyway, but maybe things would be easier for them if they called it off now. And maybe this new suitor of Steph's will facilitate that.
But then again, despite my initial reservations I've grown to like Brendan. He's a good kid, has always treated Steph well. And he's smart and ambitious and socially aware. Even if I'm still not crazy about watching him suck face with my Baby Girl. All this time I've worried about him breaking Stephie's heart. But what if she does it to him?
Poor kid.
And about this "super-cute" Joe College who is hitting on my daughter... I don't like that idea either. He's probably just out at the beach, looking for a summer fling or three or ten. Wants to make my Steph another notch on his bedpost.
Yeah, I don't like this guy. At least Brendan and I have an understanding. I pretend he and Steph are just sweet little dance partners and he maintains a healthy fear of me. What's that saying about the Devil you Know?
Man, all this teenage romance drama in my family is gonna turn the rest of my hair gray.
Think maybe I need to put on a nice, relaxing Vienna Waltz and pour another glass of wine.
Suite
Had to postpone my date for tonight. An hour later than usual, since we were flying.
Athens was a great night. A historic night. Man, that crowd was something else. Just on the edge of wild and unruly. Amazing energy. But I just couldn't quite channel it like usual. I just felt a little off-kilter. The show was still great, but I just wasn't in the mood to banter and go off-the-cuff like I have lately.
Guess I'm still a little wrapped up in myself.
Just got to Vienna, made it to the hotel. A new place this time; haven't stayed here before. This room is just un-fucking-believable. Absolutely beautiful, and HUGE. It's like staying in a palace. Which I've done before, so I should know, ha ha.
When Cate Skypes I'm gonna have to carry my iPad around and show her the place. She'll love it. Christ, we could live in just the bathroom for at least a month. There's a fucking couch in there! And a giant plasma TV mounted on the wall. Just gotta call up room service and we're set. Ha ha.
Too bad I won't be able to entice her to jump on a plane and be here by dinner tomorrow to share it with me.
But, we're in the home stretch now. One more week, then Cate's here. We're together for good. Or at least until she has to go out on her next long-term Op.
Which I hope is never.
I've been thinking all night about how things will be when I get back home. There's always an adjustment period, a month or so until my body realizes it's done with the Vampire life and the Rock Star routine. For the first couple weeks I feel like I've been lobotomized. My brain just won't work. It's all I can do to put my shoes on the right feet.
Then I go through the physical breakdown; fatigue, aches and pains, lethargy. But as much as I've been beat up on this tour maybe I've already made it through that cycle, ha ha.
Then comes the wandering-aimlessly-around-the-house phase. When I can't quite figure out what to do with myself. I'm not bored, I have NO desire to do anything related to music; I just have no idea how to live a day-to-day life. The Kids' school routines used to help when I lived with them, but once I moved out I lost that normalcy. And somehow I have a feeling living with Cate ain't gonna be much better when it comes to routine. Her hours can be wacky; she can run off at moments' notice.
But hopefully having me home will anchor her more, make her keep the work/home balance a little more sane. Maybe we can work more closely on some of the Foundation stuff, get into something she's passionate about. Maybe take on more Veterans' projects.
She'd love that; the thing she did last winter with Ken was fantastic. Wounded Warriors is a cause near and dear to Cate's heart. Kinda like Dorothea and the Kitchen. Everybody has the cause that speaks to them, especially when there's a personal connection.
And maybe I can slowly wean her away from that damned dangerous job, convince her to consider something else career-wise.
Like full-time Motherhood.
But I'm not gonna bring that up now. There will be plenty of time to talk later. After this tour, after our vacation, after she's pregnant.
And speak of the Angel... there she is, calling my Skype early.
Hello, Baby.
11:30 pm
Suite
Sitting out here on my balcony, enjoying a glass of wine and looking out over the most beautiful city in Europe. Vienna is just gorgeous. Another place to add to the bucket list. Only I think I'd like to come back here in the winter, when everything's blanketed with snow and looks like it belongs in a fairy tale.
Had a nice day off today, did some touristy stuff. Stuff Cate would love. She's gonna be SO jealous when I tell her what Renee set us up with.
We spent the afternoon at the Vienna Riding School. The place where they train the world's finest Lippizaner horses. It's literally inside the Imperial Hofburg Palace, and it's stunning.
When Steph went through her horse-crazy phase back when she was a little girl Dorothea and Mom took her to see the Lippizaners at Madison Square Garden. I remember her chattering about them nonstop for months. And she took the stuffed horse Mom bought her EVERYWHERE. She still has it, in her room.
Wonder if she'll take it to college?
Well, what we saw today was nothing short of incredible. We went for a tour of the School and of the stable, and watched part of a training session. After a fantastic lunch we were seated in the Prince's Box to watch a performance. It was a special show, something they don't do anywhere else but here.
And it was glorious. I swear, when they say ballet on horseback they ain't kidding. Classical music, choreography, traditional costumes. And those horses were something else. Half-ton beasts that danced around like they were lighter than air, with rippling muscles and flying manes and tails. It was like watching statues come to life. But then after the show when we went back to the stables, those giant creatures were snuffling my pockets, looking for carrots and peppermints just like one of Bruce's ponies back on his farm in Jersey.
Incredible.
I took a ton of photos, and I bought Cate a souvenir. It's an alabaster statue of one of the most renowned Lippizaner studs in history, a stallion that was considered to be the perfect specimen. It's a beautiful piece of art, capturing the horse reared up, performing the courbette.
And it's huge and heavy as hell, ha ha. It's gonna be delivered to the hotel so we can take it on the plane. Would cost a fortune to ship home air freight. Plus I don't want to risk it being damaged.
I thought maybe I'd put it in Cate's new office, the one I'm gonna have remodeled for her in the Jersey house. I thought a lot about it today, and decided I'm going to do it. I even made the effort to email that decorator Dorothea likes so much.
That will be my project when I recover from this tour. Designing Cate's office. And maybe redoing a few other rooms too. Maybe I'll take up interior design as a hobby. Or as my new career, ha ha.
Hey, I was a pretty damned good fashion model. I got an eye for matching stuff. I could do it if I wanted to.
Anyway, I bought stuff at the Riding School for the Kids too. Not ginormous statutes, but some pretty cool stuff. A DVD of the history of the school and the performance, a couple horse and rider models for the Chuckleheads (which will probably be turned into knights or medieval warriors or something, knowing them), and a pretty crystal pendant for Steph.
I didn't quite know what to get Jess so I got him a commemorative medallion and this replica of that Napoleon-looking hat the riders wear. If he hates it he can always give it to his brothers. Or to Bridget, ha ha.
I also picked up something special for somebody else. It's the most beautiful music box I've ever seen, with a horse jumping into the air in the capriole on top, which revolves to the Vienna Waltz. All around the base are hand-painted depictions of the Lippizaners performing the other Airs.
For my Little Roxy. Someday she'll be able to look at it and know how much her Daddy loved her even before she existed.
So after our wonderful afternoon we all came back and got ready to go out to an equally wonderful dinner, at which I ate way too much. I swear, everything they cook in Austria is rich. Even the vegetables. But it was all delicious, as was the dessert.
Grilled chicken, salad, and water for me tomorrow. And a bunch of laps in that huge indoor pool they have downstairs.
Talked to Stephie a little earlier. She had the day off from the Parrot, spent it on the beach with some friends. She said it was 100+ degrees today, even by the water. I like it hot, but that just sounds awful. Steph said it wasn't so bad, the ocean was so warm it was like swimming in the Caribbean.
She also kinda giggled and told me there's some new guy in town, who has been hanging around the Parrot trying to talk Steph out of her phone number. Apparently he'll be a Sophomore at NYU this fall, he's out in the Hamptons at his Dad and Stepmom's place, and he's "really funny and super-cute."
I had to raise an eyebrow at that comment. Could it be that Brendan has competition? When I asked Steph that she just did that embarrassed little squealy-giggly thing I think all teenage girls do. "DAAAAAAAD! Stop it! We're just frieeeeends!" Ha ha.
But now I'm intrigued. I don't quite know what to think. On the one hand, it wouldn't be the end of the world if Steph and Brendan broke up since they're both going off to different colleges next month. Chances are the distance will take its toll and they'll grow apart anyway, but maybe things would be easier for them if they called it off now. And maybe this new suitor of Steph's will facilitate that.
But then again, despite my initial reservations I've grown to like Brendan. He's a good kid, has always treated Steph well. And he's smart and ambitious and socially aware. Even if I'm still not crazy about watching him suck face with my Baby Girl. All this time I've worried about him breaking Stephie's heart. But what if she does it to him?
Poor kid.
And about this "super-cute" Joe College who is hitting on my daughter... I don't like that idea either. He's probably just out at the beach, looking for a summer fling or three or ten. Wants to make my Steph another notch on his bedpost.
Yeah, I don't like this guy. At least Brendan and I have an understanding. I pretend he and Steph are just sweet little dance partners and he maintains a healthy fear of me. What's that saying about the Devil you Know?
Man, all this teenage romance drama in my family is gonna turn the rest of my hair gray.
Think maybe I need to put on a nice, relaxing Vienna Waltz and pour another glass of wine.
Wednesday, July 20
6:55 pm
Dressing Room
In the Cone of Silence. Just me and my tea and The Cookie. Wonder what Cookie's got for me today? I can use a laugh.
Still feeling a little down though I had a wonderful double-date with my Wife last night and this morning. Not us with other people, ha ha. That would be a little awkward. Us going to bed together and waking up together. Thank God we'll be doing that in person in a little more than a week.
Cate was a little late Skyping me last night. Said she got caught up in some paperwork and time got away from her. She seemed sad, so I wondered if maybe she was trying to pull herself together so she wouldn't be a Downer when we were talking. But after the first few minutes she was fine. So was I.
We talked honestly about our disappointment that she's not pregnant yet. Of course her Logical Brain had told her all along it wasn't to be; timing wasn't right for conception last month, her body clock was all fucked up because of the traveling she was doing, she didn't have normal PMS symptoms because of stress and fatigue, yadda yadda yadda.
Problem is, her heart isn't logical. Neither is mine. There were a few tears, but we smiled though them and resolved to keep working on it. I offered to bang her at the airport the second she steps off the plane next week, just to prove I'm gonna do my part. That made her laugh. Me too.
After that things were better. We talked about the sightseeing we did yesterday, about what the guys are up to, how Richie's doing, about what's going on with her work. We did a little planning/dreaming about our trip to Sardinia. And of course we talked about the ever-so-Dreamy Mr. George Clooney. Cate was trying really hard to keep the FanGirl hidden but I could see right through her.
I told her I promised George she'd cook dinner for him next time he's in NYC. That made her squeak. Actually squeak, like some silly little mouse. It was adorable.
So after we talked and shared a glass of wine Cate asked me to sing. I was happy to oblige. She saw I did Spanish Harlem the other night and asked me what on earth made me decide to do that song, of all the old tunes I love. I told her the truth -- I have no idea. It just came to me.
I played it for Cate. Along with some other old standards and some Frank, some Elvis, some Sam Cooke. And some Stones, ha ha. Can't all be sappy romantic music. I even broke out Dean -- Return to Me and That's Amore. In honor of our upcoming Italian Holiday.
By the end of the date she was smiling and singing along.
So we finally turned off the lights and snuggled down on our pillows before we turned off the Skype. Then today we woke up and had coffee together.
It was nice.
Would love to have her here right now, but she's at work. I'm getting a little spoiled by this Skype thing. Wish I could just leave it on all the time and carry Cate around with me, ha ha.
But she'll be here soon.
So ANYWAY..... Wonder what kinda naughty stuff my Cookie Mistress is gonna say to me today?
By the way, it seems a lot dirtier now to actually EAT Cookie. Heh heh.
"Wanna melt in my Mouth, or in my Hand?"
WOW. She takes requests, ha ha.
Alright, time to Eat my Cookie (heh heh) and get my head on straight for this show. We're on the final countdown... 4 to go until my Baby's here.
Dressing Room
In the Cone of Silence. Just me and my tea and The Cookie. Wonder what Cookie's got for me today? I can use a laugh.
Still feeling a little down though I had a wonderful double-date with my Wife last night and this morning. Not us with other people, ha ha. That would be a little awkward. Us going to bed together and waking up together. Thank God we'll be doing that in person in a little more than a week.
Cate was a little late Skyping me last night. Said she got caught up in some paperwork and time got away from her. She seemed sad, so I wondered if maybe she was trying to pull herself together so she wouldn't be a Downer when we were talking. But after the first few minutes she was fine. So was I.
We talked honestly about our disappointment that she's not pregnant yet. Of course her Logical Brain had told her all along it wasn't to be; timing wasn't right for conception last month, her body clock was all fucked up because of the traveling she was doing, she didn't have normal PMS symptoms because of stress and fatigue, yadda yadda yadda.
Problem is, her heart isn't logical. Neither is mine. There were a few tears, but we smiled though them and resolved to keep working on it. I offered to bang her at the airport the second she steps off the plane next week, just to prove I'm gonna do my part. That made her laugh. Me too.
After that things were better. We talked about the sightseeing we did yesterday, about what the guys are up to, how Richie's doing, about what's going on with her work. We did a little planning/dreaming about our trip to Sardinia. And of course we talked about the ever-so-Dreamy Mr. George Clooney. Cate was trying really hard to keep the FanGirl hidden but I could see right through her.
I told her I promised George she'd cook dinner for him next time he's in NYC. That made her squeak. Actually squeak, like some silly little mouse. It was adorable.
So after we talked and shared a glass of wine Cate asked me to sing. I was happy to oblige. She saw I did Spanish Harlem the other night and asked me what on earth made me decide to do that song, of all the old tunes I love. I told her the truth -- I have no idea. It just came to me.
I played it for Cate. Along with some other old standards and some Frank, some Elvis, some Sam Cooke. And some Stones, ha ha. Can't all be sappy romantic music. I even broke out Dean -- Return to Me and That's Amore. In honor of our upcoming Italian Holiday.
By the end of the date she was smiling and singing along.
So we finally turned off the lights and snuggled down on our pillows before we turned off the Skype. Then today we woke up and had coffee together.
It was nice.
Would love to have her here right now, but she's at work. I'm getting a little spoiled by this Skype thing. Wish I could just leave it on all the time and carry Cate around with me, ha ha.
But she'll be here soon.
So ANYWAY..... Wonder what kinda naughty stuff my Cookie Mistress is gonna say to me today?
By the way, it seems a lot dirtier now to actually EAT Cookie. Heh heh.
"Wanna melt in my Mouth, or in my Hand?"
WOW. She takes requests, ha ha.
Alright, time to Eat my Cookie (heh heh) and get my head on straight for this show. We're on the final countdown... 4 to go until my Baby's here.
Tuesday, July 19
1:45 am
Suite
Almost date time again. Can't wait to talk to Cate, to tell her my idea. Wish I could make it a surprise, but there's just no way. She's gonna have to do a few things on her end before she comes over here, so I have to tell her now. The sooner the better.
I got the perfect idea for a birthday gift. Well, I stole the perfect idea, ha ha.
Ran into an old friend earlier this evening, on our way out to dinner. He was here in the hotel, arriving as we were leaving. Happened right in front of the flock of fans hanging around outside the front door, waiting for our little motorcade to take off.
So much for Clooney sneaking into town with a low profile, ha ha.
George is here on business, it seems. Something to do with his Darfur project; he's meeting with some international aid group here on Wednesday. Lis didn't come with him, he's on his own. So I invited him to come out to dinner with us so we could catch up.
We had a great time. George is one of the funniest guys I know, so down-to-earth and charming and genuine. It's easy to see why they call him the Modern Day Cary Grant. He's a good-looking guy, Clooney, and he's suave and debonair when he wants to be.
But when he hangs with me he's mainly just a Big Goof like the rest of us, Ha ha.
So we talked about everything under the sun: politics, showbiz, our philanthropy projects. He's loving the Kitchen project and promised to come roll up his sleeves and wash dishes with me sometime when he's in New York. Both Cate and Dorothea will love that, ha ha. They'll totally forget I'm there.
And of course we talked about friends and families. And women. He still hasn't been tied down, still has a gorgeous girlfriend and a fabulous bachelor life. And here I am an Old Married Fart once again, unlike that fleeting moment of freedom I was enjoying the last time Clooney and I shared a cognac and a cigar.
Tonight we raised a glass to the fact that we're both right where we want to be, in the life that suits us, ha ha. To each his own.
I showed him pics of me and Cate, told George a little of her story. Of course he'd heard about her and seen her in the press with me, but he was intrigued by my Wife's background. Said he'd love to meet her. I told him to come to dinner and we'll watch her make a fool of herself drooling over him, ha ha.
It does make me laugh to see Cate all starstruck. It's sweet.
Anyway, we spent a good few hours at this great restaurant, just hanging out and relaxing. George mentioned he's got his place in Italy on the market, decided to sell because he just didn't get a moments' peace there anymore. It's constantly being watched by the paps, he has to have police escort him in and out sometimes. That really sucks. It's a beautiful villa. But what fucking good is a vacation home if you can't escape and relax?
He said he's gonna look for another place, but he's just not sure where. Maybe Italy, maybe Spain, maybe France. Wherever it is, there has to be water and a beach and good wine.
And that's when it hit me.
The second this Tour Wrap Party is over I'm putting Cate on the jet and whisking her away to a romantic little Italian hideaway. Somewhere private and quiet and romantic where we can just enjoy the silence and each other. I'm gonna rent a villa someplace, not at a resort where there are other guests. Just some private place in a little village or something. For at least a week, not a moment less.
So I told George what I was thinking and asked him where he thought I should go. He said he knew exactly the place.
Sardinia.
I've been there before, a long time ago. It was stunning. Blue water, warm sand, gorgeous architecture, tons of history, and flowers everywhere. I can find a villa on the coast and we can spend our days just laying around, breathing in the sea air and basking in the sun.
Perfect.
So when Cate Skypes in a few minutes I'm gonna tell her to go to work tomorrow and tell Stu she's extending her leave and she'll be back sometime mid-August. She's got plenty of leave to burn and her court stuff won't happen until after Labor Day, so I know she can pull it off.
Actually, I wish she'd walk into Stu's office and hand in her resignation, but that's a conversation for another time. Maybe closer to Roxy's arrival.
I know what she's gonna say. She'll tell me it's a lovely idea, but I need to go home and spend time with my Kids. August is for family; we'll have plenty of time to be together but I only have a little time to be with Steph and the Boys. Especially with Steph leaving for college soon.
And I'm gonna tell her No.
Too many times I've let her step aside, let her defer to Dorothea and the Kids. Let her stand on the sidelines while I keep up with the old rituals and routines of my past family life. It's too easy to agree, to look at my almost-grown kids and my growing-too-fast boys and want to capture every fleeting moment with them. Because I know Cate will still be there when my time with them is done.
God knows my Babies mean the world to me, but so does my Wife. And it's time I finally put her first. Even if it can only be for a week right now. But it will be OUR week.
The Kids will understand. I'll call Dorothea as soon as we have the details and let her know. And she'll deal with it too.
Almost time. I must be grinning ear-to-ear, I'm so excited to tell her.
2:15 pm
Cafe
Playing tourist.
With entourage and security in tow, of course.
Another amazing city I don't have near enough time to enjoy. It's nice to have the extra day off so I can at least see some of Athens, though not nearly enough. Just hitting the high points today: the Acropolis and Parthenon, the National Gallery. A little shopping in the Plaka, maybe a bite to eat at a Taverna later.
Would be more fun with Cate.
My date with her last night went exactly as I predicted: I told her about our getaway to Sardinia, she was excited, then she told me we can put it off so I can get home to my Kids. But I didn't let her get away with it this time. I told her we're going, that's that, so put in for her extra leave and pack an extra bikini.
Or not. Bikini optional, ha ha.
Of course she argued a little, but she eventually backed down. I could tell how much she loved the idea. Her smile was just beautiful, and I could see her eyes shining even over the crappy webcam video stream.
So first thing this morning I called Renee and got her working on it. Clooney gave me a number of some property broker Lis knows, so Renee's starting with that to see what she can find in the way of private villas for rent. She said she should have some options for me by this evening.
Then I can share them with Cate, we can decide together what we want. Long-distance vacation planning, ha ha.
Hopefully we'll have something else to look at together tonight too -- a little plus sign or smiley face or whatever the hell those little sticks have on them now. Cate decided to delay taking her pregnancy test until tonight after she gets home from work. She said mornings are just too hectic for her, trying to get out of the house and to the office. And she didn't want to spend the day thinking about whatever the result is. Plus, she promised to Skype me before she does the test, so I'll know the answer along with her.
Though she refused to take her iPad into the WC when she pees on the stick, ha ha. She said I can wait for her on the vanity counter. I'm fine with that.
But now this means I gotta wait until midnight or after to find out if Roxy's on the way. On a day off. When I got nothing else to focus on. Cate gets to go to work and get all wrapped up in her cases, put her mind to something else. I'm wandering around Greece looking at statues of bare-breasted women, counting the minutes until we know.
How inconsiderate of my Wife, to keep me in suspense. Ha ha.
Okay, onward and upward. Literally. Got a big damned hill to climb to get to those ruins.
11:25 pm
Suite
So Cate called me when we were all out at dinner a couple hours ago. Actually, I called her. Got a text that said "no hurry, call me when you have a chance." So of course I immediately excused myself from the table and went outside the taverna and dialed.
She had good news -- her boss said no problem on the extra leave so we can escape to Sardinia. She said she's been thinking about that all day, just hiding away with me and forgetting about the rest of the world for awhile.
But she sounded kinda down. So I asked her why she's not more excited.
Her period started this afternoon. She's not pregnant.
I felt like somebody punched me in the gut when she told me that. And the Idiot I am, I said "Are you sure?" Her answer: "Baby, of course I'm sure. It's my period."
She said she was sorry. Sorry. Like it was her fault. She sounded so disappointed.
That choked me up, but I tried not to let on. I told her she has nothing to be sorry about, we'll just keep trying. We got a whole week in Italy coming up, after all. And if my math is right that will be perfect baby-making time.
She kinda chuckled and agreed, then said she had to go, there was a meeting about to start. She'll see me tonight at the usual time.
Dammit.
When I went back into the restaurant I must have looked like somebody kicked my dog because Richie immediately asked me if everything was okay. I guess I did go from laughing and goofing to being quiet and inside myself. Of course I lied and said everything's fine, Cate's fine, just checking in. Which wasn't actually a lie, per se.
It was just me that wasn't fine. I'm disappointed as Hell though I know I shouldn't have gotten my hopes up. Cate warned me not to, that her body may just be wacked-out because of all the time-zone-jumping she did the last few weeks. But she had her hopes up too.
I wish I was there to hold her, to kiss her and tell her in person it's okay, we just started trying a couple months ago. We'll get it right eventually. We just need to be together more than a couple days at a time, in this hotel room and that one, a different city every other night. Now that the tour's over we can focus all our attention on the Baby B Project.
And I wish she was here to hold me and tell me the same thing.
Suite
Almost date time again. Can't wait to talk to Cate, to tell her my idea. Wish I could make it a surprise, but there's just no way. She's gonna have to do a few things on her end before she comes over here, so I have to tell her now. The sooner the better.
I got the perfect idea for a birthday gift. Well, I stole the perfect idea, ha ha.
Ran into an old friend earlier this evening, on our way out to dinner. He was here in the hotel, arriving as we were leaving. Happened right in front of the flock of fans hanging around outside the front door, waiting for our little motorcade to take off.
So much for Clooney sneaking into town with a low profile, ha ha.
George is here on business, it seems. Something to do with his Darfur project; he's meeting with some international aid group here on Wednesday. Lis didn't come with him, he's on his own. So I invited him to come out to dinner with us so we could catch up.
We had a great time. George is one of the funniest guys I know, so down-to-earth and charming and genuine. It's easy to see why they call him the Modern Day Cary Grant. He's a good-looking guy, Clooney, and he's suave and debonair when he wants to be.
But when he hangs with me he's mainly just a Big Goof like the rest of us, Ha ha.
So we talked about everything under the sun: politics, showbiz, our philanthropy projects. He's loving the Kitchen project and promised to come roll up his sleeves and wash dishes with me sometime when he's in New York. Both Cate and Dorothea will love that, ha ha. They'll totally forget I'm there.
And of course we talked about friends and families. And women. He still hasn't been tied down, still has a gorgeous girlfriend and a fabulous bachelor life. And here I am an Old Married Fart once again, unlike that fleeting moment of freedom I was enjoying the last time Clooney and I shared a cognac and a cigar.
Tonight we raised a glass to the fact that we're both right where we want to be, in the life that suits us, ha ha. To each his own.
I showed him pics of me and Cate, told George a little of her story. Of course he'd heard about her and seen her in the press with me, but he was intrigued by my Wife's background. Said he'd love to meet her. I told him to come to dinner and we'll watch her make a fool of herself drooling over him, ha ha.
It does make me laugh to see Cate all starstruck. It's sweet.
Anyway, we spent a good few hours at this great restaurant, just hanging out and relaxing. George mentioned he's got his place in Italy on the market, decided to sell because he just didn't get a moments' peace there anymore. It's constantly being watched by the paps, he has to have police escort him in and out sometimes. That really sucks. It's a beautiful villa. But what fucking good is a vacation home if you can't escape and relax?
He said he's gonna look for another place, but he's just not sure where. Maybe Italy, maybe Spain, maybe France. Wherever it is, there has to be water and a beach and good wine.
And that's when it hit me.
The second this Tour Wrap Party is over I'm putting Cate on the jet and whisking her away to a romantic little Italian hideaway. Somewhere private and quiet and romantic where we can just enjoy the silence and each other. I'm gonna rent a villa someplace, not at a resort where there are other guests. Just some private place in a little village or something. For at least a week, not a moment less.
So I told George what I was thinking and asked him where he thought I should go. He said he knew exactly the place.
Sardinia.
I've been there before, a long time ago. It was stunning. Blue water, warm sand, gorgeous architecture, tons of history, and flowers everywhere. I can find a villa on the coast and we can spend our days just laying around, breathing in the sea air and basking in the sun.
Perfect.
So when Cate Skypes in a few minutes I'm gonna tell her to go to work tomorrow and tell Stu she's extending her leave and she'll be back sometime mid-August. She's got plenty of leave to burn and her court stuff won't happen until after Labor Day, so I know she can pull it off.
Actually, I wish she'd walk into Stu's office and hand in her resignation, but that's a conversation for another time. Maybe closer to Roxy's arrival.
I know what she's gonna say. She'll tell me it's a lovely idea, but I need to go home and spend time with my Kids. August is for family; we'll have plenty of time to be together but I only have a little time to be with Steph and the Boys. Especially with Steph leaving for college soon.
And I'm gonna tell her No.
Too many times I've let her step aside, let her defer to Dorothea and the Kids. Let her stand on the sidelines while I keep up with the old rituals and routines of my past family life. It's too easy to agree, to look at my almost-grown kids and my growing-too-fast boys and want to capture every fleeting moment with them. Because I know Cate will still be there when my time with them is done.
God knows my Babies mean the world to me, but so does my Wife. And it's time I finally put her first. Even if it can only be for a week right now. But it will be OUR week.
The Kids will understand. I'll call Dorothea as soon as we have the details and let her know. And she'll deal with it too.
Almost time. I must be grinning ear-to-ear, I'm so excited to tell her.
2:15 pm
Cafe
Playing tourist.
With entourage and security in tow, of course.
Another amazing city I don't have near enough time to enjoy. It's nice to have the extra day off so I can at least see some of Athens, though not nearly enough. Just hitting the high points today: the Acropolis and Parthenon, the National Gallery. A little shopping in the Plaka, maybe a bite to eat at a Taverna later.
Would be more fun with Cate.
My date with her last night went exactly as I predicted: I told her about our getaway to Sardinia, she was excited, then she told me we can put it off so I can get home to my Kids. But I didn't let her get away with it this time. I told her we're going, that's that, so put in for her extra leave and pack an extra bikini.
Or not. Bikini optional, ha ha.
Of course she argued a little, but she eventually backed down. I could tell how much she loved the idea. Her smile was just beautiful, and I could see her eyes shining even over the crappy webcam video stream.
So first thing this morning I called Renee and got her working on it. Clooney gave me a number of some property broker Lis knows, so Renee's starting with that to see what she can find in the way of private villas for rent. She said she should have some options for me by this evening.
Then I can share them with Cate, we can decide together what we want. Long-distance vacation planning, ha ha.
Hopefully we'll have something else to look at together tonight too -- a little plus sign or smiley face or whatever the hell those little sticks have on them now. Cate decided to delay taking her pregnancy test until tonight after she gets home from work. She said mornings are just too hectic for her, trying to get out of the house and to the office. And she didn't want to spend the day thinking about whatever the result is. Plus, she promised to Skype me before she does the test, so I'll know the answer along with her.
Though she refused to take her iPad into the WC when she pees on the stick, ha ha. She said I can wait for her on the vanity counter. I'm fine with that.
But now this means I gotta wait until midnight or after to find out if Roxy's on the way. On a day off. When I got nothing else to focus on. Cate gets to go to work and get all wrapped up in her cases, put her mind to something else. I'm wandering around Greece looking at statues of bare-breasted women, counting the minutes until we know.
How inconsiderate of my Wife, to keep me in suspense. Ha ha.
Okay, onward and upward. Literally. Got a big damned hill to climb to get to those ruins.
11:25 pm
Suite
So Cate called me when we were all out at dinner a couple hours ago. Actually, I called her. Got a text that said "no hurry, call me when you have a chance." So of course I immediately excused myself from the table and went outside the taverna and dialed.
She had good news -- her boss said no problem on the extra leave so we can escape to Sardinia. She said she's been thinking about that all day, just hiding away with me and forgetting about the rest of the world for awhile.
But she sounded kinda down. So I asked her why she's not more excited.
Her period started this afternoon. She's not pregnant.
I felt like somebody punched me in the gut when she told me that. And the Idiot I am, I said "Are you sure?" Her answer: "Baby, of course I'm sure. It's my period."
She said she was sorry. Sorry. Like it was her fault. She sounded so disappointed.
That choked me up, but I tried not to let on. I told her she has nothing to be sorry about, we'll just keep trying. We got a whole week in Italy coming up, after all. And if my math is right that will be perfect baby-making time.
She kinda chuckled and agreed, then said she had to go, there was a meeting about to start. She'll see me tonight at the usual time.
Dammit.
When I went back into the restaurant I must have looked like somebody kicked my dog because Richie immediately asked me if everything was okay. I guess I did go from laughing and goofing to being quiet and inside myself. Of course I lied and said everything's fine, Cate's fine, just checking in. Which wasn't actually a lie, per se.
It was just me that wasn't fine. I'm disappointed as Hell though I know I shouldn't have gotten my hopes up. Cate warned me not to, that her body may just be wacked-out because of all the time-zone-jumping she did the last few weeks. But she had her hopes up too.
I wish I was there to hold her, to kiss her and tell her in person it's okay, we just started trying a couple months ago. We'll get it right eventually. We just need to be together more than a couple days at a time, in this hotel room and that one, a different city every other night. Now that the tour's over we can focus all our attention on the Baby B Project.
And I wish she was here to hold me and tell me the same thing.
Monday, July 18
1:40 am
Suite
Ducked out of the bar early to come back up for my nightly date. Thought I'd do things up romantic for a lovely and semi-dirty conversation with my lovely and very naughty Wife. I had some roses and champagne and candles sent up to my room and had the steward light a fire in the fireplace even though it's the middle of summer. (I cranked up the AC, ha ha).
I bet the hotel staff is wondering what the Hell I'm up to. Probably doing a lot of wink-wink/nudge-nudge about the Rock Star bringing some woman (or three) back to his room.
Little do they know, ha ha.
Anyway, so I'm lounging here in my bathrobe, sipping at this $300 bottle of bubbly, listening to a little Frank on the stereo and staring at my iPad, waiting for the appointed hour to open up Skype.
And my phone rings. It's Dorothea.
My Son is an idiot.
I TOLD Jess to be good this weekend, to have fun but not get into trouble, since he finally made it out of the doghouse with his Mother. I thought he got that message loud and clear. Apparently not, because Momma is NOT amused.
Though technically Jess didn't "get into trouble." He went where he was supposed to go, checked in when he was supposed to, was home in plenty of time for curfew. There were no calls from the Cops and no bail money was required.
This falls into one of those gray areas. What Jess did isn't illegal. (Well, maybe it is under some kinda State licensing law but that's the shop's fault). But it sure didn't make Dorothea happy. At ALL.
Seems Jesse and his buddies all decided to do a little male bonding last night. They were hanging out at the beach house together, watching the bikinis and having a few brews, and decided to make one of those High School Buddies Pacts.
Then they all went out and got tattoos.
I got nothin' on this one. I can't say I'm really all that pissed. It's a tattoo. Lots of people have them nowadays. Dorothea and I both have ink, though we didn't get ours until we were adults. Yeah, it would have been nice if Jess would have asked/warned us he was gonna do it (which Dorothea probably would have forbidden), but he is sixteen, after all. A man in most ways.
Just not necessarily when it comes to common sense, ha ha.
So D puts Number One Son on the phone and the first words out of my mouth were "Please tell me you didn't ink a girl's name on your body."
Jess kinda chuckled -- I could hear D in the background asking him what was so damned funny -- and said "No, Sir."
No SIR? He was totally buttering me up. Yeah, the Kid knew I'd be on his side. Or at least stay neutral.
He wasn't wrong.
So I told him to spill the story, the whole thing. He did. It was pretty simple, just what Dorothea said. It was one of those Buddy Pact things, something you do when you're young and standing on the edge of independence, something to remember the moment by. Jesse, Jeremy, and a couple other guys went and got inked together, then went back to their beach house and hung out. No big deal. It's not like they were smoking crack and banging hookers, for Christ's sake.
It's about Brotherhood. I get that.
And in all honesty, I don't really think it's that big a deal.
But I sure as fuck ain't gonna say that to Dorothea, ha ha. Or to Jess.
Yep, I'm taking the Switzerland route on this one. Totally neutral. Besides, what's done is done.
And I gotta admit, when Jess told me what his tat is, it made me smile.
He got the Superman shield, above his ankle.
That's My Boy.
5:40 pm
Balcony
5:40 pm
Balcony
Sitting out here enjoying the gorgeous view. The Aegean Sea.
Wish Cate was here to see it. I sent her a photo, but a picture doesn't do it justice.
It's almost lunchtime back in New York, almost dinnertime here. I talked to her this morning and we have our date again tonight. My romantic plans didn't quite come to fruition last night after my unexpected conversation with Dorothea and Jesse. Cate and I still had our date, but we ended up talking more about Jess and the other Kiddos than about us.
The Perils of Parenthood, ha ha.
And I still haven't gotten her naked on Skype. Beginning to think that might be a lost cause. Probably the best I can hope for are the occasional accidental peek-a-boob views.
Oh Well. The tour's almost over. I'll be home soon and I can see Cate's tits up close and personal any time I want.
Two more weeks. Then it's over. The day I thought would never come is finally almost here.
Kind of a shame. The last few nights have been great. We've finally gotten it together again, the Boys and I. After all we've been through this tour, we're finally getting back to where we like to be. Up there on that stage, playing for us. The fans may think it's for them and of course it is, but there's a little piece of these last few shows that have been just for us.
Gonna miss that when it's over, even though I'll be the one leading the charge out the door, ha ha.
We all need to go home and just BE for awhile. See our families, figure out how to be Daddies and Husbands and Joe Schmoes again. Then after awhile we'll get itchy again, start writing and thinking about the next record. It's inevitable. Happens every time. Even back after the Jersey Tour, when we pissed and burned out and not even talking. We brought it back.
We can't help it. It's what we do. It's in our blood.
I'm glad Cate will be here for our last show of the tour. She's been such a trooper, with me being gone and tired and half-crazy for the past year and a half. She understands; she's used to it considering what she's done in her own career. She deserves to be at the party too, when we pop that champagne and celebrate.
Though she won't be drinking champagne, I have a feeling. Sparkling water. Or grape juice. At least I'm hoping.
Tomorrow we'll know. She's taking her pregnancy test tomorrow morning. Not sure I'll be able to sleep tonight, thinking about it.
It will be Cate's birthday when she's here. Kinda fitting, Our last show = Her birthday. Her present is she gets her husband back, ha ha.
No, I need to think of something special to get her. When I was home last I came up with the idea to remodel the upstairs office out at the Jersey house for her. But I never got around to making the calls. So that's obviously out as a birthday present. Maybe Christmas.
I've bought her so much jewelry I don't have any ideas in that department either. And she's not really a Jewelry Girl. She wears her rings and a watch and a chain, but unless we're dressed up to go out she doesn't really wear the sparkly stuff.
I gotta think of something or I'm gonna be way behind in the gift department. I still owe her a honeymoon, for fuck's sake.
Maybe I'll have to pick some brains for ideas. Not mine, obviously -- it's empty.
But first I'm going out to eat. Real Greek food, by the sea.
Sunday, July 17
7:20 pm
Dressing Room
Just talked to Cate again. She's in Red Bank, sitting at our favorite sidewalk cafe and having a little lunch.
Wish I could be there with her, eating summer tomato salad and drinking iced tea on a shady patio, instead of being holed up here in yet another dressing room and regretting eating peppers on my salad.
Cate went out to the Jersey house yesterday, said she just wanted to get away from the city for awhile. She's been just hanging out by the pool, playing with her dog, reading, having a lazy weekend. She went to the Farmer's Market yesterday. And she said she got me a present, which she'll give me when I come home.
But she won't tell me what it is. Tease.
But hopefully she'll be giving me the best present of all in a couple days. Still no period. She's gonna take one of those home pregnancy tests on Tuesday if it doesn't show up before then. She'll be a week late then.
Keeping my fingers and toes crossed that little stick turns blue.
So anyway, it's almost showtime. That means Cookie Time.
It's slightly disturbing that I've started to look forward to Cookie Time. But this is the only action I'm getting lately, ha ha.
"Bodies like yours keep nude beaches in business."
Why thank you, Cookie. Heh heh.
Dressing Room
Just talked to Cate again. She's in Red Bank, sitting at our favorite sidewalk cafe and having a little lunch.
Wish I could be there with her, eating summer tomato salad and drinking iced tea on a shady patio, instead of being holed up here in yet another dressing room and regretting eating peppers on my salad.
Cate went out to the Jersey house yesterday, said she just wanted to get away from the city for awhile. She's been just hanging out by the pool, playing with her dog, reading, having a lazy weekend. She went to the Farmer's Market yesterday. And she said she got me a present, which she'll give me when I come home.
But she won't tell me what it is. Tease.
But hopefully she'll be giving me the best present of all in a couple days. Still no period. She's gonna take one of those home pregnancy tests on Tuesday if it doesn't show up before then. She'll be a week late then.
Keeping my fingers and toes crossed that little stick turns blue.
So anyway, it's almost showtime. That means Cookie Time.
It's slightly disturbing that I've started to look forward to Cookie Time. But this is the only action I'm getting lately, ha ha.
"Bodies like yours keep nude beaches in business."
Why thank you, Cookie. Heh heh.
Saturday, July 16
4:50 pm
Suite
Okay, I'm officially tired of talking. Ha ha.
I was on Skype with the Boys for over an hour. I've been promising Jakey and Romey we'd talk on the "TV phone" as Romeo calls it. But they've been so damned busy and all over the place and with the time zones it's been hard to find a time that works on both ends.
So when I talked to Dorothea yesterday we agreed to set it up for today. This morning their time, afternoon here. She called me then we dialed up the Skype and she set the laptop up on the kitchen table for the Chuckleheads.
Then she fled to take a shower. Told me it was my turn to entertain them while she got a couple minutes' peace, ha ha.
It was a lot of fun, though it took Romey a little bit to get the point that he didn't have to put his face right up to the webcam. I swear, I spent the first 10 minutes of the conversation looking up his boogery nostril. At one point he even mashed his nose against the cam. Of course me laughing didn't discourage him from doing it. But I couldn't help myself.
And then after he figured out I could see him better if he sat back, and I could see BOTH him and his brother if they sat side-by-side, it became show-and-tell time. Jakey would be rattling on about something and Romey would bolt out of the room and come back with some toy or piece of paper or something. I swear I saw every Transformer that kid owns.
And I got to talk to Russell, which was basically me talking to a picture of the kitchen table, ha ha.
At one point Jake got the bright idea to pick up the laptop because he wanted to go watch TV but he still wanted to talk to me. I had to yell at him to FREEZE because I knew if he fucked up D's laptop she'd have Jakey's ass. And then she'd probably blame me.
Finally Jess came wandering into the room in his boxers, fresh out of bed at 10 am on a Saturday morning. He saw what was going on and helped get the Chuckleheads settled down, then he grabbed a Coke and sat down to say Hi.
We talked a little about last week's Round 3 of football camp, and what his plans were for the weekend. Jake and Romey totally lost interest once I started paying attention to Jess and disappeared to watch TV. That was fine with me; I love 'em but I was exhausted just trying to keep up with them. And I wasn't even there. I was sitting here in my posh hotel suite trying to hold a somewhat sane conversation.
So Jess told me his Mama was cutting him a break, letting him go down the Shore with some buddies today and overnight tonight. I said that's great, I'm glad he and D are getting along better. She told me yesterday when we talked that Jesse's attitude has been a lot better, he's more his old self. I had to chuckle at that. It's because all is well in the Woman Department, no doubt.
I asked about Bridget and Jess just grinned and kinda hung his head like he does when he's a little embarrassed. She's not going to be out in Jersey with him this weekend; she had to go to a wedding someplace. Just a boys' weekend, hanging out in some beach house one of his friends' folks have in Wildwood.
But next weekend Jess and Bridget have BIG plans. It's her birthday on Saturday, and he's taking her out for a fancy dinner and to see a show. I asked him what he's getting her for a present, then about choked on my tea when he told me.
He got her a ring. From Tiffany.
Bet that took a nice chunk out of his checking account. I tried to hide my surprise but I don't think I did very well. I casually asked "what kind of ring?" And my Son, obviously the Original Chucklehead, said "a silver one." DUH. I laughed and said No, I meant was there something special about this ring, does it symbolize something?
Jess just shrugged and mumbled "yeah, kinda."
Shit. The Boy bought a promise ring. Is that what they still call them? That's what it was when I was his age, when a guy bought a pretty little ring for his girl and swore someday he'd buy her an engagement diamond and a wedding band. And then probably at least half of those promises were broken, and the guy ended up with a lighter wallet and the chick ended up with a piece of jewelry to remind her of young love. Ha ha.
Anyway, I didn't push. I just said I'm sure Bridget will love the ring, and made a mental note to have a heart-to-heart with Jess when I get home. After all, he's only gonna be a junior in high school, for Christ's sake. And Bridget's heading off to college. I get the burning passion of young love and vows of devotion... but chances are it ain't gonna last. I hope for Jesse's sake it does, but I have my doubts.
So I could see he didn't really want to share, and being the Cool Dad I am I just changed the subject. To football, ha ha. I told him I got an email that my Giants tickets were being mailed this week so we'll be sure to catch a few games. And I told him I had it on good authority from an Inside Source that this lockout's gonna end in time for the season to go, so not to worry. This fall I got nothin' but time to be a Football Freak. Tour's done, no new record on the way, no more movies. Just Family and Foundation.
Jess grinned at that, said he can't wait to hang out with me. Then he slurped down his Coke and said he needed to go hit the shower and get his shit together for his weekend. Jeremy was picking him up at noon.
I told Jess to have fun and be careful and use his head; he doesn't want to get himself back in the doghouse with Mama. He said he would.
So then I had nobody left to talk to as the Chuckles had abandoned me. So I closed up Skype and went to take a shower. Now I'm just waiting for the knock on my door to head out to Soundcheck.
Another day, another dollar. And only a couple more weeks 'til I get to go home and hang out with my Boys.
7:10 pm
Dressing Room
Berg's hanging around, snapping shots of me. You know, those "intimate, private moments" of the Artist backstage.
Surprised he doesn't want to shoot me taking my Pre-show Dump, Ha ha.
Alright, Dirty Cookie. Let's see what you got for me tonight...
"There are a lot of fish in the sea, but you're the one to Mount."
Heh heh.
I may have to use that line on Cate. How romantic, comparing my wife to a prize tuna. Ha ha.
Berg got me on film opening my cookie. I look like a Doof. Best Rock Photog in the fucking universe and he can't even make me look Cool.
No way that one's going up on his site. That one gets the Official Reject Stamp from Jon Bon Jovi himself, Ha ha.
Go the fuck away, Berg. I want to call my wife before the show.
Suite
Okay, I'm officially tired of talking. Ha ha.
I was on Skype with the Boys for over an hour. I've been promising Jakey and Romey we'd talk on the "TV phone" as Romeo calls it. But they've been so damned busy and all over the place and with the time zones it's been hard to find a time that works on both ends.
So when I talked to Dorothea yesterday we agreed to set it up for today. This morning their time, afternoon here. She called me then we dialed up the Skype and she set the laptop up on the kitchen table for the Chuckleheads.
Then she fled to take a shower. Told me it was my turn to entertain them while she got a couple minutes' peace, ha ha.
It was a lot of fun, though it took Romey a little bit to get the point that he didn't have to put his face right up to the webcam. I swear, I spent the first 10 minutes of the conversation looking up his boogery nostril. At one point he even mashed his nose against the cam. Of course me laughing didn't discourage him from doing it. But I couldn't help myself.
And then after he figured out I could see him better if he sat back, and I could see BOTH him and his brother if they sat side-by-side, it became show-and-tell time. Jakey would be rattling on about something and Romey would bolt out of the room and come back with some toy or piece of paper or something. I swear I saw every Transformer that kid owns.
And I got to talk to Russell, which was basically me talking to a picture of the kitchen table, ha ha.
At one point Jake got the bright idea to pick up the laptop because he wanted to go watch TV but he still wanted to talk to me. I had to yell at him to FREEZE because I knew if he fucked up D's laptop she'd have Jakey's ass. And then she'd probably blame me.
Finally Jess came wandering into the room in his boxers, fresh out of bed at 10 am on a Saturday morning. He saw what was going on and helped get the Chuckleheads settled down, then he grabbed a Coke and sat down to say Hi.
We talked a little about last week's Round 3 of football camp, and what his plans were for the weekend. Jake and Romey totally lost interest once I started paying attention to Jess and disappeared to watch TV. That was fine with me; I love 'em but I was exhausted just trying to keep up with them. And I wasn't even there. I was sitting here in my posh hotel suite trying to hold a somewhat sane conversation.
So Jess told me his Mama was cutting him a break, letting him go down the Shore with some buddies today and overnight tonight. I said that's great, I'm glad he and D are getting along better. She told me yesterday when we talked that Jesse's attitude has been a lot better, he's more his old self. I had to chuckle at that. It's because all is well in the Woman Department, no doubt.
I asked about Bridget and Jess just grinned and kinda hung his head like he does when he's a little embarrassed. She's not going to be out in Jersey with him this weekend; she had to go to a wedding someplace. Just a boys' weekend, hanging out in some beach house one of his friends' folks have in Wildwood.
But next weekend Jess and Bridget have BIG plans. It's her birthday on Saturday, and he's taking her out for a fancy dinner and to see a show. I asked him what he's getting her for a present, then about choked on my tea when he told me.
He got her a ring. From Tiffany.
Bet that took a nice chunk out of his checking account. I tried to hide my surprise but I don't think I did very well. I casually asked "what kind of ring?" And my Son, obviously the Original Chucklehead, said "a silver one." DUH. I laughed and said No, I meant was there something special about this ring, does it symbolize something?
Jess just shrugged and mumbled "yeah, kinda."
Shit. The Boy bought a promise ring. Is that what they still call them? That's what it was when I was his age, when a guy bought a pretty little ring for his girl and swore someday he'd buy her an engagement diamond and a wedding band. And then probably at least half of those promises were broken, and the guy ended up with a lighter wallet and the chick ended up with a piece of jewelry to remind her of young love. Ha ha.
Anyway, I didn't push. I just said I'm sure Bridget will love the ring, and made a mental note to have a heart-to-heart with Jess when I get home. After all, he's only gonna be a junior in high school, for Christ's sake. And Bridget's heading off to college. I get the burning passion of young love and vows of devotion... but chances are it ain't gonna last. I hope for Jesse's sake it does, but I have my doubts.
So I could see he didn't really want to share, and being the Cool Dad I am I just changed the subject. To football, ha ha. I told him I got an email that my Giants tickets were being mailed this week so we'll be sure to catch a few games. And I told him I had it on good authority from an Inside Source that this lockout's gonna end in time for the season to go, so not to worry. This fall I got nothin' but time to be a Football Freak. Tour's done, no new record on the way, no more movies. Just Family and Foundation.
Jess grinned at that, said he can't wait to hang out with me. Then he slurped down his Coke and said he needed to go hit the shower and get his shit together for his weekend. Jeremy was picking him up at noon.
I told Jess to have fun and be careful and use his head; he doesn't want to get himself back in the doghouse with Mama. He said he would.
So then I had nobody left to talk to as the Chuckles had abandoned me. So I closed up Skype and went to take a shower. Now I'm just waiting for the knock on my door to head out to Soundcheck.
Another day, another dollar. And only a couple more weeks 'til I get to go home and hang out with my Boys.
7:10 pm
Dressing Room
Berg's hanging around, snapping shots of me. You know, those "intimate, private moments" of the Artist backstage.
Surprised he doesn't want to shoot me taking my Pre-show Dump, Ha ha.
Alright, Dirty Cookie. Let's see what you got for me tonight...
"There are a lot of fish in the sea, but you're the one to Mount."
Heh heh.
I may have to use that line on Cate. How romantic, comparing my wife to a prize tuna. Ha ha.
Berg got me on film opening my cookie. I look like a Doof. Best Rock Photog in the fucking universe and he can't even make me look Cool.
No way that one's going up on his site. That one gets the Official Reject Stamp from Jon Bon Jovi himself, Ha ha.
Go the fuck away, Berg. I want to call my wife before the show.
Friday, July 15
2:20 am
Suite
Date with Cate. My favorite part of the day.
So I told her about my fortune cookie. How yesterday I got this really, really dirty one, then today I got one that said something about not liking my clothes. And how now I know it can't be Dawn fucking with my cookies because she'd never say something about my wardrobe.
Cate laughed so hard I thought she was gonna hyperventilate. Then she called me an Idiot.
When she explained it to me, I felt like an Idiot. Today's cookie was about me being naked, not about my clothes being ugly.
Well that makes more sense, considering how dirty some of these damned fortunes have gotten.
I still think it's Lemma. Though I don't know how he's doing it. Cate just shook her head and told me I'm spending WAY too much time thinking about this.
Maybe she's right.
Anyway, I got other stuff to focus on now. Like Cate. She's feeling a little better, her wrist isn't bothering her too bad but it hurts a little. She said she has some super-Motrin for it but she's not taking it. I know she hates taking medicine, she barely took the stuff she was prescribed for her broken ribs after she got beat up. She just guts it out.
Of course I scolded her and told her she better take her meds and take care of herself because I want her to be 100% when she gets here in a couple weeks. 'Cause she's gonna need ALL her energy to keep up with me in bed, ha ha.
But when she told me why she doesn't wanna take her drugs I got such a huge stupid grin on my face I could hardly talk.
Her period's late.
Not by much -- just a few days. She told me not to get too excited or get my hopes up; nothing's for sure yet. She's not even gonna take a test until she's a full week late. But she's usually regular as clockwork and she can feel it coming a couple days out. All those great PMS symptoms -- backache, bloating, sore tits, moodiness... she gets 'em. Especially the moodiness, ha ha.
But Cate says she feels great right now. Except for her wrist, of course.
Fuck worrying about these damned cookies. My Baby may have MY cookie in her oven, ha ha.
And I can't wait to see her and kiss her tummy.
6:50 pm
Suite
Had a little lunch date with my Baby today. She has a "paperwork day" so she decided to go home for lunch and telework from there for the rest of the day. She Skyped me from home, we had a nice little chat.
She's feeling good today, her wrist doesn't really hurt. Just the wrap annoying her. She's not using the sling either. And still no sign of Aunt Flo.
I think this is it. I can just feel it. Little Roxy's in there.
Anyway, my silly Wife was in a good mood, felt like teasing me a little. She had music playing in the background when she called. Duffy. Mercy.
And she made cue cards with the lyrics for me. She held 'em up and sang along. And she told me she changed the ringtone on her phone to me fucking up the words the other night in Germany.
Smartass. She's been on YouTube again.
Anyway, our lunch date was a nice little surprise in an otherwise kinda slow day. Going out in a minute to do a little shopping then go to dinner with the guys. Maybe I'll pick up something pretty for Cate. And for Roxy.
And now I'm gonna be singing that fucking song all Goddamned night.
You got me beggin' you for Mercy....
Suite
Date with Cate. My favorite part of the day.
So I told her about my fortune cookie. How yesterday I got this really, really dirty one, then today I got one that said something about not liking my clothes. And how now I know it can't be Dawn fucking with my cookies because she'd never say something about my wardrobe.
Cate laughed so hard I thought she was gonna hyperventilate. Then she called me an Idiot.
When she explained it to me, I felt like an Idiot. Today's cookie was about me being naked, not about my clothes being ugly.
Well that makes more sense, considering how dirty some of these damned fortunes have gotten.
I still think it's Lemma. Though I don't know how he's doing it. Cate just shook her head and told me I'm spending WAY too much time thinking about this.
Maybe she's right.
Anyway, I got other stuff to focus on now. Like Cate. She's feeling a little better, her wrist isn't bothering her too bad but it hurts a little. She said she has some super-Motrin for it but she's not taking it. I know she hates taking medicine, she barely took the stuff she was prescribed for her broken ribs after she got beat up. She just guts it out.
Of course I scolded her and told her she better take her meds and take care of herself because I want her to be 100% when she gets here in a couple weeks. 'Cause she's gonna need ALL her energy to keep up with me in bed, ha ha.
But when she told me why she doesn't wanna take her drugs I got such a huge stupid grin on my face I could hardly talk.
Her period's late.
Not by much -- just a few days. She told me not to get too excited or get my hopes up; nothing's for sure yet. She's not even gonna take a test until she's a full week late. But she's usually regular as clockwork and she can feel it coming a couple days out. All those great PMS symptoms -- backache, bloating, sore tits, moodiness... she gets 'em. Especially the moodiness, ha ha.
But Cate says she feels great right now. Except for her wrist, of course.
Fuck worrying about these damned cookies. My Baby may have MY cookie in her oven, ha ha.
And I can't wait to see her and kiss her tummy.
6:50 pm
Suite
Had a little lunch date with my Baby today. She has a "paperwork day" so she decided to go home for lunch and telework from there for the rest of the day. She Skyped me from home, we had a nice little chat.
She's feeling good today, her wrist doesn't really hurt. Just the wrap annoying her. She's not using the sling either. And still no sign of Aunt Flo.
I think this is it. I can just feel it. Little Roxy's in there.
Anyway, my silly Wife was in a good mood, felt like teasing me a little. She had music playing in the background when she called. Duffy. Mercy.
And she made cue cards with the lyrics for me. She held 'em up and sang along. And she told me she changed the ringtone on her phone to me fucking up the words the other night in Germany.
Smartass. She's been on YouTube again.
Anyway, our lunch date was a nice little surprise in an otherwise kinda slow day. Going out in a minute to do a little shopping then go to dinner with the guys. Maybe I'll pick up something pretty for Cate. And for Roxy.
And now I'm gonna be singing that fucking song all Goddamned night.
You got me beggin' you for Mercy....
Thursday, July 14
2:45 am
Suite
Just finished my Skype date with Cate. Was all revved up and ready to sweet-talk and whine and grovel until she gave me Skype-Sex. But that idea went out the window as soon as I saw her.
She has her arm in a sling. And her wrist all bandaged up.
Of course I immediately panicked, asked her what the Hell happened. I couldn't stop myself from flashing back to when I got back home after Vancouver and found her all battered and bruised from the attack during her Op in the islands.
My heart stopped and my stomach flipped. But I knew she wasn't out in the field today -- I texted with her on and off. She was at the office all day.
Cate hurt herself when I was onstage, so she didn't bother to text or call and tell me. She knew I wouldn't be able to talk until late and we had our date anyway. And she said it wasn't serious, though it don't look good.
When she told me I couldn't help myself. I about busted a gut laughing. Not because she hurt herself -- that sucks. But HOW she did it.... Oh, the sight that must have been.
She fell off her pole.
My Wife wanted to surprise me. That new exercise class she started a few weeks ago is actually a pole-dancing class. She thought it would be fun and she wanted to learn a few moves to spice things up in our love life. I guess after our little Vegas trip and her encounter with Sexy Raven she got inspired, heh heh.
But apparently she's a sucky pole dancer. I mean, seriously... She fell OFF the POLE.
I'm giggling even now.
I know I shouldn't laugh. She sprained her wrist, has to keep it immobilized for a few days, maybe longer. It's not serious, but painful enough she went to the urgent care clinic. Poor thing. She's hoping it will be better before she flies over to meet me in Spain in a couple weeks. Me too. I don't want her to be all wrapped up or in pain for her birthday and for our end-of-tour celebration.
But she FELL off her POLE.
Hahahahaha.
She was a good sport about me laughing at her, and she even laughed a little herself. But I think after the third time I burst into giggles while we were talking about other stuff she started to get a little pissed.
And I wisely kept my mouth shut about asking her to strip down and talk dirty to me. Guess I'll have to do that for myself tonight. Or rely on pay-per-view.
So that's two things my Wife sucks at: skiing and pole dancing. And I love her anyway, ha ha.
And if I know my Cate she's not gonna give up trying to improve her skills at either. Which is fine by me.
Heh heh.
7:05 pm
Dressing Room
Now I'm confused. I'm getting conflicting wardrobe advice from the Cookie.
"That outfit is really ugly. Take it off immediately."
Well it liked what I was wearing yesterday....
This can't be Dawn. Why would she say she doesn't like the way she dresses me?
Still smells like Lemma.
Suite
Just finished my Skype date with Cate. Was all revved up and ready to sweet-talk and whine and grovel until she gave me Skype-Sex. But that idea went out the window as soon as I saw her.
She has her arm in a sling. And her wrist all bandaged up.
Of course I immediately panicked, asked her what the Hell happened. I couldn't stop myself from flashing back to when I got back home after Vancouver and found her all battered and bruised from the attack during her Op in the islands.
My heart stopped and my stomach flipped. But I knew she wasn't out in the field today -- I texted with her on and off. She was at the office all day.
Cate hurt herself when I was onstage, so she didn't bother to text or call and tell me. She knew I wouldn't be able to talk until late and we had our date anyway. And she said it wasn't serious, though it don't look good.
When she told me I couldn't help myself. I about busted a gut laughing. Not because she hurt herself -- that sucks. But HOW she did it.... Oh, the sight that must have been.
She fell off her pole.
My Wife wanted to surprise me. That new exercise class she started a few weeks ago is actually a pole-dancing class. She thought it would be fun and she wanted to learn a few moves to spice things up in our love life. I guess after our little Vegas trip and her encounter with Sexy Raven she got inspired, heh heh.
But apparently she's a sucky pole dancer. I mean, seriously... She fell OFF the POLE.
I'm giggling even now.
I know I shouldn't laugh. She sprained her wrist, has to keep it immobilized for a few days, maybe longer. It's not serious, but painful enough she went to the urgent care clinic. Poor thing. She's hoping it will be better before she flies over to meet me in Spain in a couple weeks. Me too. I don't want her to be all wrapped up or in pain for her birthday and for our end-of-tour celebration.
But she FELL off her POLE.
Hahahahaha.
She was a good sport about me laughing at her, and she even laughed a little herself. But I think after the third time I burst into giggles while we were talking about other stuff she started to get a little pissed.
And I wisely kept my mouth shut about asking her to strip down and talk dirty to me. Guess I'll have to do that for myself tonight. Or rely on pay-per-view.
So that's two things my Wife sucks at: skiing and pole dancing. And I love her anyway, ha ha.
And if I know my Cate she's not gonna give up trying to improve her skills at either. Which is fine by me.
Heh heh.
7:05 pm
Dressing Room
Now I'm confused. I'm getting conflicting wardrobe advice from the Cookie.
"That outfit is really ugly. Take it off immediately."
Well it liked what I was wearing yesterday....
This can't be Dawn. Why would she say she doesn't like the way she dresses me?
Still smells like Lemma.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)